How to start life over. To begin a new life? Easy
The main aspect of the study in psychology is the nature of a person and the factors influencing self-development. Elements of introspection, making a life plan and step-by-step implementation of the goal will help you find your way and enjoy the world. Simple Tips help shape new personality with a positive attitude and motivation in action.
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The dynamics of changes in a person's character will help to reveal and predict the possible development of events in his life.
- 1. What should change lead to? Understanding this stimulates development and gives strength to decisions.
- 2. What will bring the goal to fruition? We need to understand why change and what can be learned from it. In psychology, this is polarity - changes can bring both benefit and harm, there will be no neutral effect.
- 3. How long will it take to achieve? Depending on the goal, you can approximately indicate the timing of its achievement. When a person sees time limits, it motivates to dynamics and movement.
- 4. Will the implementation help in terms of self-realization? In other words, whether the chosen role will suit the person and whether he will be able to feel comfortable in the chosen image.
- 1. Realistic look at things. It is impossible to change yourself in a short period of time. It's long and painstaking work, requiring strength, time and desire. If at first there are hitches, then you must either reconsider the action plan, or abandon the idea.
- 2. Stop making excuses. No amount of advice and psychology will help if people start looking for reasons not to do certain work. The more refusals and the search for excuses in life, the worse a person lives. He cannot go beyond the idleness and mediocrity created by his own hands. The application of maximum effort and perseverance will give a good result, regardless of who has to change everything in life: an emotional teenager, an abandoned woman or a man.
- 3. The blame for the consequences lies with the individual. Shifting responsibility for one's actions to others indicates an emotionally and mentally immature person who will not be able to cope with serious decisions in life and realize their potential.
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Desire to change everything
People are emotional and suspicious. Even if from the outside it seems that a person does not respond to comments or criticism, this is not so. The negative gradually accumulates inside and causes more and more unpleasant sensations until the boiling point is reached and the person wants to change everything at once.
The desire to start from scratch can arise at any age, psychologists note the framework between 16 and 45 years. At this time, key changes occur in the body, a person begins to understand himself and his needs, feels his role in society and tries to achieve his goals.
In most cases, the craving for change comes under the influence of negative emotions. Feelings of extremity, rejection environment, deep resentment, emotional stress, like a volcano, undermine common sense and challenge a person.
Psychological overtones
From a psychological standpoint, there is nothing wrong with that. Changes provide an opportunity to try something new and feel in an unexplored environment. Throughout life, the choice of role and place of play is important. A person can imagine himself as anyone and try to get used to the social framework. When the choice is made independently, then in the future the person will be satisfied with the decision, but if someone influenced the role or provided a ready-made template and pointed out the edges that cannot be exceeded, then the person will be uncomfortable being in it.
Often this happens with parents who try to embody in their children those qualities that have not been revealed in themselves. They take care of their children so much that they make life choices and roles for them. This will not bring happiness and opportunities for self-realization to the child, but parents will be able to fully control and decide his fate.
Over time, when the children grow up, understand what they want to do, they will have a desire to change the scenario. This is normal and should not prevent them from forming their worldview.
Change can be triggered by stress, emotional disconnect, loss of loved ones, or trauma. A person deserves to change for the better, you just need to choose the right development scheme and scenario for a new life for personal growth.
Target selection
It is not enough just to want to live again, for this you need to make a lot of effort and time, to determine for yourself what “from scratch” means.
Small additional steps on the path to change should be combined with a common result. Goal selection is the basis of change. If you change just like that, without a specific reason, based on emotional instabilities, then there will be no positive effect. A person will simply get lost among his masks and roles and get confused in his own feelings. The subconscious mind stores a lot of information and moments based on feelings.
If there are a lot of them, the person runs the risk of losing important memories. For orientation in the selection process, psychologists advise using a small direction. It is necessary to answer the questions posed in order to navigate the scenarios from scratch:
Write down the answers on a piece of paper and put them on your desktop so that it serves as some kind of navigation and stops you from rash decisions in time. You can’t feel sorry for yourself and choose a goal smaller than what is currently available. A person needs growth, not degradation, the higher the goal, the more interesting it is to change and change, to embody what was conceived and enjoy the result.
Perseverance as an engine
Time is limited, and people cannot boast that they will be able to achieve a large number of goals in a lifetime. There may be several attempts to change, so do not waste time and just dream. If your intuition tells you that the time has come to take responsibility for your destiny into your own hands and start something new, then there is no need to wait for better opportunities.
Without perseverance and perseverance, there will be no result. Even if at first it seems that there are no changes and this period will never end, there is no need to retreat.
To forget about the passive life position and start developing, you can use the method of small steps. For several weeks, perform minor tasks that are part of the elements of achieving the goal. It will be impossible to see progress in a day, but a week of unobtrusive perseverance will help you see progress.
If the steps are easy to follow and there is a desire to do more, then this means the dynamics of growth and the development of willpower. How more people force themselves to do something, the faster and better the result. If one task did not work out, you do not need to quit it and move on. We must try all over again until the effect is one hundred percent.
The coaching technique gives advice not to give up and even if you fail, move on.
Internal energy
Emotional exhaustion and loss of a source of strength have a negative impact not only on well-being, but also on work efficiency. Even physically it will not be possible to engage in changes if there is not enough fuel for work inside.
You can draw strength from various sources, ranging from material things to pleasant memories or achievements. Well renews the strength of the connection with nature. It is necessary at least once every few days to go to a park or forest, breathe fresh air and just listen to the silence. It pacifies and tones the body, cleanses of problems.
Doing what you love to do or hobby gives you strength and motivation. Many people limit their time for rest, devoting themselves completely to work. This is wrong, because every sphere of life is important and necessary. Harmony between work and leisure, inner enjoyment and material realization are considered the basis of a healthy person.
Surrounding people can fill with positive emotions. A person needs a spiritual mentor or leader. It can be a famous person or a friend you want to be like.
Books are a constant source of energy and wisdom. They nourish the human mind and evoke emotions, show different scenarios and introduce the development path to other people. It is a source of experience and knowledge, without which change is impossible. Tip: you need to read two books a month to keep your mind in suspense for the development of inner peace.
New environment for new ideas
It's hard to drop everything and take the first step blindly. Emotional changes will not occur in a normal way unless a person begins to embody them materially. Make repairs in the apartment, continue to keep a diary, change your image and hobbies - a chain of small changes that will definitely leave a mark on your soul.
This is a kind of test for possible reactions, sensations. If a person is comfortable, then he is on the right track. When small changes cause panic, then you need to think about whether it is worth putting yourself at risk and creating conflict situations for the body and mind.
It is impossible to cross out the past without memories. Sooner or later, old habits will start to come out and drag you back to the old days. To counter this, psychologists recommend continuing to work on yourself and not stop there. After all, if after the changes there is an effect, the person has chosen the right path and must move on, continuing to work.
The new environment allows a person to try on a role that has not been used before. This is the background for the script.
Those who are determined to change should read the recommendations of psychologists:
Some tips for an effective result are not enough, you need to make a lot of effort and energy to move forward, but this is a good guide on the way.
Individuals who have tuned in to cardinal changes in life should be prepared for the fact that barriers and obstacles on the way will arise quite often. This does not mean that you need to stop and rethink your goal. Emotionally, even small obstacles grow to a global size, because subconsciously it is difficult to accept major changes.
By increasing the dose of fear, the brain tries to protect against possible problems. Performing small tasks will relieve the load and provide an opportunity to gradually move towards the goal.
| Advice | Implementation |
| An important decision requires weighing the pros and cons | You can not rush into the maelstrom of change, so as not to harm yourself either mentally or morally. It is necessary to understand what sacrifices will have to be made if the change is accepted. If the decision requires a lot, and in return does not give more, then there is no need to take risks. |
| Once you take a position, don't change it. | Most people first tune in to changes, and then in the process of modifications come to the conclusion that they do not need it. As a result - wasted time, disappointment and unwillingness to move forward |
| Planning a day - a successful life | Drawing up a small action plan for the day allows you to navigate your capabilities and evaluate the rhythm. Thanks to this, willpower is developed and the dynamics of development can be traced. No need to overload your day with business, time to relax with your husband, loved one or friend will give strength and energy, and your favorite activities will help relieve stress. Therefore, they also have a place in the diary |
| Bad habits have no place in the life of an active person | People try with the help of alcohol, cigarettes to alleviate the condition after separation, divorce or loss. But in fact it is suicide, burning common sense. Nothing will help better than confident steps into the future and understanding your own goal. It is much easier and easier to succeed when the body is healthy and does not require treatment. |
| Thoughts, like words, materialize. This must be remembered when forming desires | The way a person expresses himself, what he thinks about is his mental background, the aura in which the mind resides. It is logical that if he starts thinking about bad things, the body itself moves to do them. So, in addition to doing what has been said, you can additionally harm yourself with the wrong wording. In psychology, it is recommended not to wish for something that will radically change your life, so as not to get yourself into trouble. |
force of habit
Even completing all the tasks to achieve the goal may not bring the desired result. Then a person faces a choice: to start all over again or to change himself.
Norwegian psychologists came to the conclusion that for success, an individual does not have to work hard all the time, performing different tasks. It is enough to create a set of static tasks for yourself and for a certain time to engage in their implementation. This will form a habit and allow you to perform actions automatically while doing other things.
To form a habit and automate actions, a period of 21 days is considered optimal. After the expiration of the period, a person independently and without reminders does standard tasks in a shorter period of time, spending less effort and energy.
The more habits formed, the faster a positive result will appear and you can start new life. You can't put scientific research in the form of an experiment as a pattern of change, but choosing a time frame to solve the problem and follow the dynamics is a useful tip.
To get started, you can work out in physical condition, run, do exercises, or use a cleansing diet. After 21 days, see the result, make comparisons and start developing another habit, automating the first one to mechanical execution.
Changing life, drawing up new scenarios and playing interesting roles can well develop willpower and social qualities, enabling a person to feel at a new level in society.
For each of us, a new day is new chapter in life. Do you feel like you've reached a dead end? Do you want to start over and change your life? Feel like Bill Murray's character in a movie groundhog day who had to relive the same day over and over again? Change is always scary, but everyone deserves to live the way they see fit. There are several ways to review your life and start again with a clean slate.
Steps
Part 1
Look back at the past-
Define your purpose. Reflections on the meaning of life is your first important step on the way to big changes.
Set goals, make decisions. First determine your purpose in life and common goals and then decide how to achieve your goals and what changes might be needed. Want to leave your current partner? Move to another city? Continue learning?
- Set short, medium and long term personal goals. Write down the decisions and leave them in a visible place (on the refrigerator door or on the bedroom mirror).
- Organize your life. Change will not happen if there is no order in life. If you know exactly the desired changes and goals, then you can draw up an action plan.
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Take a new path. Surprise yourself and do something different. So you will see yourself and your abilities from a new perspective.
Your new motto is a sense of importance. Live in the moment and understand that nothing else matters. Give him all your attention. This is your reality. When that moment is over, move on to the next one. You are alive? Yes. So, the moment is lived successfully! Each subsequent moment will bring you one step closer to an active life.
Soberly evaluate yourself. A person cannot know everything. You make mistakes. If you are able to change the oil in your engine, cook a gourmet dinner, or understand macroeconomics, this does not make you a good or bad person. It only means that you understand certain issues. Do you strive for knowledge or do you want to prove something to others? Consider why this is important to you. Does it give you joy? In the case of a negative answer, it is better to leave such an occupation! Knowing everything is impossible, and it is not necessary.
Rely on others and seek help. Accept the idea that you don't need to know everything, and then analyze all the things you try to do that are more advanced or not of interest to you. A specialist can do better than you: just pay someone to change the oil or redecorate your bedroom. Plan your time wisely and do what you really can do on your own.
Accept your past. It is impossible to start life over if you continue to cling to the past. It is important to accept the situation that has developed in a relationship, at work, in a family or another aspect of life.
For every event there is a reason. No one says that a person is powerless and every moment is "predetermined" by fate. It would be more correct to say that each situation has only the meaning that we ascribe to it. Only our perception turns any event or moment into an uplifting or crushing experience.
Analyze your failures and successes. You can not leave life behind and "swallow resentment" if events do not develop according to plan. Think: "What did I do right in this situation or circumstances?".
Don't announce that you are starting over. Just act. You don't have to voice your decisions to change your life. Do not tell others about your plans and do not ask how you should proceed. Often in moments of doubt, we seek advice to make sure that the decision is correct or to change our intentions. Your life is only YOUR life. Move forward and people will change with you. For that matter, this is the only way to weed out unsuitable or outsiders.
Part 2
Live the futureIt's never easy to start over. It's a leap into the unknown. To do this, you need to take a deep breath and say goodbye to people and things that should be left behind. This road is difficult to walk, but worth it if you are unhappy and in need of change.
It is likely that you have already had to start everything from scratch several times. Perhaps this "reset" was the result of problems at work, something more personal, or problems in the family.
What can keep us from taking the plunge to find our own happiness is the thought that "it's too late." That is, if a person reaches a certain age, then he must already give up and come to terms with the circumstances, because his opportunities have passed and are left behind.
But it's not. It's never too late to start over and find your happiness. In fact, it is the duty of each person to himself.
How to change your life, no matter what and no one
Think about your future and who you want to be
If you are overwhelmed with doubts, worries or fears, try this visualization exercise: imagine yourself in two years, but happy, harmonious and peaceful.
Now evaluate how you feel. Instead of looking for some illusory happiness, remember that inner peace, balance and wholeness is enough in life. If you do not have such feelings, you need to start changing something. You deserve to give yourself another chance.
Start with small, short-term goals
For all changes, you need to make small decisions that, step by step, will bring you closer to the goal. Here are some examples of small goals that each person should set for themselves.
Today I will control my anxieties and worries. Since I have already decided that I am starting over, I take responsibility and make my own decision. I will turn fears into inner peace and certainty.
Today I will look for more information on how to help yourself start from scratch (vacancies, help social services and other official organizations).
You are not as alone as you think: find the right support
Of course, completely changing your life is not easy, because it causes new fears and anxiety. One way to find strength is to have someone who supports us and understands the new path we have chosen to take.
Choose support wisely. Family and friends can't always give best advice, or even vice versa, they will advise "not to do something" or "be patient a little more."
If you decide to start over on a new page, seek help from people who have already been through something similar. They will be able to advise you better and give you strength to move on.
The future can always be changed and is full of new possibilities.
The past has only one purpose - to teach us and give us wisdom. It makes us smarter through experience and life lessons. It gives a person extra courage, which is a powerful weapon.
When we take a step towards change, everything becomes very new, but by no means bad. Although it can be scary, it gives us a chance to achieve our dreams.
Every person wants above all to feel good, to be free from worries, tears and defeats. These things don't define who you are, but they give you the motivation to move on and become successful.
Let go of the thoughts and beliefs that are holding you back.
"I'm too old. I'll never be able to find a job." Think about your skills and be creative when it's time to "sell yourself". This will not only help you find a job, but also connect with yourself. Make the most of your creativity.
"I've never been alone, so I have to put up with everything." Let go of that thought that limits you, and remember that loneliness is a reflection of your freedom, and that's exactly what you need to create your happiness.
"I know that I will fail and everything will go wrong." Forget about this idea. You are not a psychic, so you cannot guess what will happen and what will not. Remember that thoughts are the source of emotions, so negative perception will lead to the same result.
"No one supports me and my efforts will be lost anyway." Do not give force to such ideas. The most important source of support to rely on lies within everyone. And only then there are friends, family and other people around who support you, helping to build a new life.
Gradually, you will begin to understand that everything was worth the effort. Starting from scratch is not easy, but do not forget that every person deserves happiness and that all difficulties and problems are left behind.
There are other ways to start a new life, so Altucher urges you to listen to him with a grain of salt. This cheat sheet works for him. However, he has seen it work for several hundred other people as well. James was able to verify this by taking numerous interviews for his podcast, reading letters addressed to him, and simply living the last twenty years.
James Altucher
So, if you dream of changing your life, trying something new, then this is for you. Faktrum publishes these helpful and uncompromising tips.
1. Update never stops
Every day you rediscover yourself. You are always on the move. And every day you decide what kind of movement it is - forward or backward.
2. You start from the beginning
Every title from the past that you will defend is just vanity. Have you been a doctor? Graduated from an Ivy League university? Were you a millionaire? Did you have a family? Nobody cares about this. You have lost everything. You are zero. Don't even try to prove that you are something.
3. You need a mentor
Otherwise, you will go to the bottom. Someone has to teach you how to move and breathe. Don't worry too much about this item.
4. Here are three types of mentors
- Direct. Someone who is close to you, who tells how he achieved everything. What is behind "everything"? More on this later. By the way, the mentor is not at all someone like an elderly Japanese man from the 1984 movie Karate Kid. Almost all mentors will hate you.
- Indirect. These are books and films. You can get 90% of mentoring from books and other materials. 200-500 books are comparable to one good mentor. You ask: “What good book would you recommend?”. There is no answer to this question. There are 200–500 good books which should be read. Whatever your beliefs, read every day.
- Everything around is a teacher. If you are a blank slate and strive for renewal, then everything around you becomes a metaphor for action. You see a tree, but you don't see its roots and the underground springs that feed it - it's all a metaphor for a computer program, if you put the facts together correctly. In the future, you will find connection in everything you see.
5. Don't worry if you don't have passion for anything.
You are concerned about your health. Start with this. Small steps. You do not need a strong spiritual zeal to succeed. Do your job with love and success will follow.
6. Renewal needs 5 years
Here is a breakdown of those five years:
- Year one: You waste your energy on a lot of useless things, read avidly and only approach the real action
- Year two: you know with whom and why you need to communicate. Dedicate yourself to the cause every day. You finally realize that your aspirations are like a Monopoly game board.
- Year Three: You are already good enough to start making your first money. But life is still far from ideal.
- Year four: you live a beautiful life
- Year five: you earn wealth.
It's easy to get frustrated in the first four years. "Why hasn't anything happened yet?" - such a question will torment you. This is fine. Just keep going. Or stop and choose new area. After all, you are already dead, and starting a new life is a difficult thing.
7. If you're doing it faster or slower, you're doing something wrong.
Story Google illustrates this well.
8. It's not about the money. But money is a good measure
When people say "it's not about the money," they need to be sure they have another good yardstick. “What if you just do what you love?” - you ask. Keep in mind that there are many days ahead in which you will hate your job. If you are in business only out of love for him, it will take much longer than five years. Happiness is just positive impulses in our brain. Sometimes you will be unhappy. The brain is the tool we use, not who we are.
9. When can you say "I'm doing X", where X is your new career?
10. When can I start doing X?
Today. If you want to be an artist, buy your canvas and paints today, start buying the first of 500 books, and pick up your brush. If you want to learn how to write, then do three things:
- Read
- Write
- Take your favorite work by your favorite author and rewrite it word for word. Ask yourself why he chose those words. Today he is your mentor.
If you want to start your own business, start thinking about a business idea. The update starts today. And it goes on every day.
11. How will I earn?
In three years, you will devote 5-7 thousand hours to the cause. This is enough to become one of the top two or three hundred in anything. The top 200 professionals in almost every field make a decent living. By the third year, you will know how to make money. By the fourth year, you will be earning enough. Some stop in the fourth year.
In the fifth year, you will be among the top 30-50 in your business and amass a fortune.
12. How do you know exactly what to do?
Everything that the soul will feel while reading 500 books. Go to book store and find it. If you're still bored after three months, go back to the bookstore.
13. How do you know exactly what to do?
Being disappointed is okay. Success is better than failure, but it's after failure that we learn the most important lessons. It is very important not to rush. You will find yourself anew many times throughout your interesting life. And there will be many mistakes. Find the positives in this.
When you change your life dramatically several times, then your chronicle turns into an interesting book of stories, not a boring textbook. Many people want their life story to be a well-researched textbook. For better or worse, the Altusher book is a book of stories.
14. Your choice today will be your biography tomorrow.
Make interesting decisions and you will have an interesting biography.
15. What if I like some kind of absurdity? For example, biblical archeology or 11th century wars?
Go through all the steps above and you'll be making tons of money in your fifth year. How? No idea. Don't try to find the end of the road in the first step.
16. What if the family wants me to work as a financier?
How many years of your life did you promise your family? Ten years? All life? And then wait for the next life. The good news is that the choice is yours.
Choose freedom or family. Freedom from prejudice. Freedom from authorities. Freedom from the need to please people. Then you please yourself.
17. My mentor wants me to follow his path.
Fine. Learn his path. And then do it your way. Sincerely. Nobody puts a gun to your head, do they?
18. My spouse is worried about who will take care of the children.
Then go about your new life after a 16-hour day as a janitor. The one who rediscovers himself will always have free time. Set aside a little time for your work. Think about it whenever possible.
19. What if my friends think I'm crazy?
What other friends?
20. What if I want to be an astronaut?
This is not a reinvention of oneself, but simply a specific work. Do you like outer space? You have a wide range of career options. Richard Branson wanted to be an astronaut and launched Virgin Galactic.
21. What if I like to hang out and drink?
Read this post in a year.
22. What if I cheat on my wife/husband or betray my partner?
Re-read this post in two or three years, when you get divorced, lose your job and no one needs you.
23. What if I have no skills at all?
Reread point 2.
24. What if I have no education or a useless degree?
Reread point 2.
25. What if I have to pay off debts or mortgages?
Reread paragraph 18.
26. Why do I always feel like an outsider?
Albert Einstein was the same. Each of us at some point feels out of place. Highest Degree creativity is born out of skepticism.
Just give up.
28. What if I am too sick to upgrade?
Renewal stimulates the production of useful chemical substances in your body: serotonin, dopamine, oxytocin. As you keep moving forward, you may not be completely healed, but you will be healthier. Don't use illness as an excuse. Finally, take care of your health. Sleep more, eat more. Go in for sports. These are the key steps to start a new life.
29. What if a past partner cheated on me and I'm still suing him?
Stop litigation and never think about him again. Half the problem was you, not him.
29. What if I go to jail?
Fabulous. Re-read point 2. Read a lot of books in prison.
30. What if I'm shy?
Turn your weaknesses into yours strengths. Introverts listen more carefully, focus better, and more effectively win people over.
31. What if I can't wait five years?
If you plan to live another five years at all, it would be good to start today.
32. What is the best way to get acquainted?
Imagine a concentric circle. You are in the center.
The next circle is friends and family.
The next one is online communities.
The next one is meetings of interest and invitations for coffee.
The next one is conferences and opinion leaders.
The next one is mentors.
The next one is customers and producers of goods.
Develop relationships through these circles.
33. What if I think I'm the best at what I do?
After 6-12 months, you will return to point 2.
34. What if I'm passionate about two things from different fields and can't choose between them?
Combine two areas and you will be the best combined.
Get started teaching with YouTube videos. Start with one student and see if the audience grows.
36. What if I want to earn money while I sleep?
In the fourth year, outsource your business.
37. How to meet mentors and opinion leaders?
When you have enough knowledge (after 100-200 books), write 10 ideas for 20 potential mentors. None of them will answer. Write 10 more ideas for 20 new potential mentors. Repeat this weekly. Make a mailing list for those who do not respond. Keep going until someone answers. Start a blog about your efforts. Build a community around what you are going to be an expert in.
39. What if I can't come up with an idea?
Keep practicing coming up with ideas. The muscles responsible for ideas atrophy over time. You must build these muscles.
It's hard to reach your toes if you don't exercise every day. To do this, you need to repeat the exercises regularly. Don't expect ideas to start coming on the first day.
After books, read websites, forums, magazines. But, by and large, there is one garbage.
41. What if I do everything you say, but it still doesn't work?
It will work. Just wait. Don't try to see the end of the road. Fog prevents you from seeing your destination. But you can see where to take the next step, and you know that each step brings you closer to the end of the road.
42. What should I do if I am depressed?
Spend an hour in silence. This is required to reconnect with the inner self. If you think this sounds stupid, don't do it. And keep sinking into depression.
43. What if all this scares me?
Sleep eight to nine hours a day and never gossip. Sleep is the key to health. But not the only key, but simply No. 1. Some say: “I only need four hours of sleep” or “in my homeland, sleep is equated with laziness.” Well, these people are waiting for failure and early death.
When it comes to gossip, our brains biologically want to be friends with 150 people. When you are alone with one of your friends, you start talking about the 149 that are left. If you don't have 150 friends, then your brain makes you read gossip magazines to create the illusion that you have those 150 friends.
Don't be as stupid as your brain.
44. What if I keep feeling that none of this will work for me?
Spend ten minutes a day practicing gratitude. Don't suppress fear. Pay attention to anger. Anger never inspires, and gratitude does a good job of it. Gratitude is the bridge between your world and the parallel universe where all creative ideas live.
45. What if I constantly have to deal with people who do not believe in me?
Find a new environment for yourself. Anyone who starts life with a clean slate faces those who incite to turn off the intended path. Biology tells the brain to keep you safe from danger, and renewal is a risk. So get ready to say goodbye to people who are trying to stop you.
And learn to say no.
46. What if I am happy to sit in the office closet at my current job?
47. How can I trust you when you fail several times?
Don't trust.
48. Will you be my mentor?
You have already read this post!
A load of mistakes, painful memories, damaged relationships... All this often poisons people's lives. Is there a way out and how to start life from scratch? Let's talk about this today.
How to start the first steps
- a) Determine if you really need it? It happens that a momentary weakness or small everyday problems become for us like a wall along the whole life path. It's one thing, but quite another when everything that surrounds you starts to put pressure on you. In this case, it's time to restart your life. b) Think about what you will take with you to a new life: friends, acquaintances, things ... All this can put pressure on you or vice versa, inspire you! Think about who or what you will take into a new, happy life. c) Believe that nothing can stand in your way if you really want to be happy in a new, bright life! Nothing! Yes, at first it will be difficult to part with old attitudes and complexes, but the more active you are on your path to happiness, the faster you will be able to reach the very state in which you will finally find happiness!
Is it worth it to quit your job and live the life you want?
Here you only need to understand what is meant by the words "live as you want." If we are talking about lying on the couch all day and doing nothing, then this is definitely a road to nowhere. It will be about something else. If you feel that what you are doing in life does not bring you pleasure, then think about whether this is the life path that you need, which is destined for you. After all, a born artist should not, for example, drive a tram, and a baker should not paint fences. As Confucius said: “Choose a job you like, and you won’t have to work a single day in your life.” You can quit your job if you don’t feel happy for a day at it. And it's not just that you're not doing your job. An evil-minded team can also poison the atmosphere. The thing is that you need to do what you love where you are, and it will itself be in demand. For example, you write articles well and got a job as a journalist in one of the central newspapers. You are talented, and a lot of envious people have appeared there who consider you an upstart reporter. Intrigues begin to weave against you, you get not the best tasks, etc. But this is not a reason to quit journalism, but you can change your place of work. Don't take your current job as a mistake. It was just a stepping stone where you could develop a portfolio for yourself and gain experience that you can implement in new edition, with a more accommodating team. Sometimes things turn out so badly for people that it seems that life has completely collapsed. In this situation, there is no choice: either to live on, or to wallow in grief over a broken life.
What can a new life be like at 30?
The midlife crisis is approaching suddenly! You begin to feel worthless and look for faults in others. Your youthful fuse went out, and your life began to turn into a routine. If all this fits your condition, then this item is for you. Congratulations. You are a victim of a midlife crisis! It starts because you start to rethink the values of your youth. This is approximately like a transitional age in youth, only it comes to maturity, by the age of thirty. In this situation, you understand that you “lived aimlessly” your youth, and you can’t return it. Is it possible to start a new life at thirty? Certainly! And here's how:1) Go in for sports! It's never too late. Of course, you are unlikely to get to the Olympics, but you will put your body in order. 2) Think about whether everything is fine in your personal life? If you are unhappy in marriage, or still live with your mother, then it's time to deal with this. 3) Think about your friends: if you feel that those with whom you spend time are dragging you down, you should immediately untie this ballast. Otherwise, your ship will also sink. 4) Work: Think about the following questions:- Why did I choose this job? Am I getting enough? Do they bring me joy? Do I like the team? Do I want to work in this job until retirement?
You can start all over again at 40
Think Henry Ford. His famous Ford Motors company was founded by him at the age of 40! Or Colonel Sanders? Or Red Bull founder Dietrich Mateschitz. All of them began their journey to fame at the age of 40. If they succeeded, why can't you? Fifty years. Round date- Exactly half a century. But, if you feel that later life is becoming difficult for you, then who said that nothing will change? For many, life is just beginning at fifty. If you feel that you are getting old and cannot keep up with life, then this is a great reason to immediately change your life. Urgently consider what you would like to do in the new, happy life and forward - to the feats. Life is given to us once, and it can not be spent mediocre. Just start looking younger - change your hair, look for something from modern gadgets, look for a hobby on the side, in the end. Just remember that your choice is not great - either keep up with the times, or a rocking chair, a blanket and endless TV shows ... Do you need it?
Neil Fiore's book "An easy way to start a new life"
This work of a famous psychologist is dedicated to how to start a new life. It says that this is not as difficult as it seems. Brief description of the book From the author's point of view, bad habits are developed in a person just at the time when he is trying to cope with a stressful situation. Neil Fiore teaches you how to unleash your enormous potential, which will allow you to cope even with a difficult life situation. The book is written with irony, but it is not harsh. A professional psychologist is well aware that his audience is people who have experienced stress and are very vulnerable. But in the work there are many comical situations that will not only explain how to get out of the situation correctly, but also have a lot of fun. Download Neil Fiore's book easy way to begin a new life"Vladimir Gerasichev: “After the film, start a new life”
If you don’t like reading books, then you can get information on how to start living over from a wonderful video that lasts a little over an hour. Just make sure you watch it to the end. This is a film by Vladimir Gerasichev about how different people achieve their goals. What impresses in the video is that a person here is not so much taught to be successful as to be happy. Indeed, while some cannot realize their dream, others simply do not even have it. All these situations are analyzed by the author of the video.Best Motivational Training Film
The video “After the movie, start a new life” can rightly be called the best. Yes, the author sometimes speaks harshly to people who came to him for training. Perhaps this is done in order to stir up lazy people. But for those who have lost hope, it’s good to pay attention here to Nick Vuychich, a man who has no arms and legs, and Slava Polunin, a famous clown, besides the owner of a rare award. There are other heroes here, and they are so different that everyone can find an example to follow. How it was possible to fit so much into a short video material - it's incomprehensible to the mind!Watch the video: a film that changes lives
Why it is not possible to start life over again - psychology
There are many different options for why it doesn’t work out for you:1) Perhaps someone is pulling you down? Friends, work, family, co-workers... All of them can be the cause of your failures: colleagues set you up, your wife nags, your friends only call you when they need a drinking buddy... This is all a heavy burden and in order to throw it away, you need to once and to understand forever that you will have to get rid of those who are pulling you to the bottom once and for all. Radically. Yes, it may be cruel, but when gangrene spreads through the leg, the leg is cut off to save the whole body. Like this. 2) Laziness? Maybe you're just not ready to work on changing your life? Of course, laziness often overcomes each of us, but think about what will happen if you do not start working on changing your life. All of the above are paths to nowhere. And if you do not turn off them, then your life will become even more miserable than it is now. Is this what you want? If not, then start changing, or you will continue to vegetate. 3) Perhaps there are objective circumstances that interfere with you? Illnesses of relatives, debts, small children and other life situations that do not allow you to develop here and now. Here it is necessary to understand that such situations are not eternal and can be solved by you if you take them seriously. Children will grow up, relatives will recover, and you will pay off your debts. It is never too late to start a new life, the main thing is that on the way to this there should not be something that will drag you back. 4) Perhaps a tyrant relative dominates you. This is the most unpleasant situation, but you can get out of it. You won’t be able to do this right away, but you can start squeezing a slave out of yourself drop by drop, and this will certainly lead you to success. The first thing to do is to part ways with the despot by hook or by crook. You need to leave it to yourself, and during this time you yourself work on yourself. You can find yourself a defender, moral support in the person of other relatives, friends, the second half and even a child. Such a transfer of the fulcrum will give a respite, new strength and a sense of freedom. And if necessary, you will even have to rein in the tyrant, show him his place. It’s easier if the mother-in-law or father-in-law acts as a despot, worse if your own parents. But you are already an adult, you have the right to own life and own opinion. Implement it, you can do it! In conclusion, I want to say that unsolvable problems can not be. Also, there are no unsolvable situations. There are only your opportunities that can be improved, and your laziness. If you have arms and legs, you are not bedridden, then you can still fix it! Hands should not fall, and everything should always be treated with humor. The exception, of course, is the death of a loved one, there is no time for jokes. But you can rise above the rest of the hardships and even ridicule them. And when the soul becomes easier, then it will not be so difficult to cope with the problem. Rising above the hustle and bustle, you will feel a new person in yourself. You can even do the same thing that you did before, but you will find yourself anew, rejuvenate your soul. And then you can safely say that you started to live from the beginning.
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