How to get out of your comfort zone list. Leaving the comfort zone as a condition for personal development

Today, the fear of novelty is often spoken of by practical psychologists who are faced with two categories of clients. The first are those for whom “everything is fine”, but there is no satisfaction, the taste of life, the drive go somewhere; and others are those for whom “everything is bad”, but it is very scary to take a step towards change. In the second case, the principle “better bad, but familiar, than new, but unpredictable” works. Let's analyze together what the specifics of the fear of novelty are, why its occurrence is a pattern, and how to deal with it.

Where does the fear of change come from?

Remember the heroes of F. Dostoevsky? This author, like no one else in Russian literature, managed to embody in his novels heroes who "have nowhere else to go." And when this threshold of despair, melancholy and hopelessness is reached, a person commits a crime, commits irrational insane acts - because he has nothing to lose. Hence, the first reason for the fear of leaving the comfort zone is its very existence. If a person is held by something that has value in his eyes, there will definitely be a fear of novelty, a fear of leaving the comfort zone. But what is it? It's not so much a place as it is a state. The ability to perform actions brought to automatism without hesitation, to know exactly what they will lead to - the implementation of the usual, the use of long-proven strategies of behavior and thinking. It is interesting that, acting and living according to such principles, a person does not use even a fifth of his potential, and therefore a vague dissatisfaction with predictability and stability grows. Somewhere in the depths of the psyche lies the desire for progress, moving forward. Therefore, sooner or later, a person feels the duality of his position: on the one hand, the familiar sets patterns and gives peace, on the other hand, it looks like stagnation.

The second reason for the fear of novelty – the inability to accurately predict the consequences. What happens if I change jobs? Partner? Will I change my attitude to many things? The absence of familiar points of support leads to risks that are quite understandable. And in fact, it may indeed turn out that "the best is the enemy of the good." But after all, changing strategies is a process, not a given, you can always develop a certain attitude towards changes and make your own adjustments. It is quite obvious that without going beyond the comfort zone, it is impossible to psychological formation, neither growing up, nor mastering a new experience. The meaning of human life is in development, it is inherent in us a priori. Remember the teachings of L. Vygotsky - about the "zone of proximal development"? The only possible principle of high-quality education of a child is to set him such goals that he first achieves accompanied by an adult, then under the supervision of elders, and then himself. And what was unknown to him yesterday, today has become a “zone of proximal development”, and tomorrow it will turn out to be a comfort zone when the basic skills and abilities are honed.

Techniques to help you get out of your comfort zone

If a person is aimed at achieving a result, leaving the comfort zone is the most important condition, because life at half strength does not bring happiness. How can I do that?

The first principle is the gradual expansion of the comfort zone. Make the unfamiliar explored and your comfort zone will expand. The cognitive need, in principle, is insatiable, and therefore a person can literally master everything. It is only important to determine the guidelines. The main thing is to start changing the pattern of behavior step by step. Want to lose weight instead of sitting in front of the TV for hours? Don't run right away gym and force yourself to engage in a frenzy. At first, you can simply reduce the time you watch TV, start walking more, and then, when this mode becomes familiar, set yourself the next bar. You can’t drastically change the usual - in this case, it is likely that the swinging pendulum will just as sharply turn in the opposite direction and everything will return to normal, and you will get another reason to lower your self-esteem.

The second principle: to change the attitude to what is happening. Leaving the comfort zone is an expansion of worldview boundaries, so it makes you more tolerant, calmer, more self-confident. Think about what you are interested in and delve into this topic, even if it does not yet bring obvious benefits or profits. It does not matter. Become different, allow yourself to be carried away, interested, delve into some topic. This forms an alternative view of what is happening. There is a good technique: about any event, develop an attitude that would take into account the positive and negative aspects of what is happening. For example: “I have less work to do. What are the pros of this? Minuses?" Or: “I was deprived of the bonus. Pros? Minuses?" Sometimes it causes laughter, sometimes bitterness, but be that as it may, you yourself expand your own perception, which means that it is possible to acquire not only a different attitude to what is happening, but also develop other actions in everyday life.

The third principle: the habit of setting goals. You can write them down, draw them, make a collage of magazine illustrations - somehow visibly recreate them so that they gain life while in your mind. Thought, as you know, is material. And the more tangible the goal, the greater the opportunity to spontaneously build a logical chain of actions that will lead to its achievement. And then at any moment you can internally stop yourself and ask: “Is what I am doing now leading to the achievement of my goal?” The answer will be obvious. In general, the ability to hear yourself and take into account your inner mood is a great art that will bring dividends in any case. Then there is less risk of absorbing other people's values ​​and truths, and more opportunities to make decisions on your own.

The fourth principle: communicate more with different people. There is no paradox in this: crisis psychologists have come to the conclusion that it is much easier to survive a traumatic event for those who have a sympathetic environment. Developmental psychology has long argued that without socialization, the full development of the child is generally impossible. Communication expands the boundaries of consciousness, allows you to take alternative points of view, understand your own individuality (through “mirroring” by others), even just catch on to a randomly thrown phrase, which sometimes gives rise to real insight. The more flexible, sociable a person is, the easier he is to implement new strategies, he knows how to follow unbeaten paths - and invariably wins.

Our psyche is universal. On the one hand, it contains a setting to preserve what was once acquired, which is expressed in the expected reactions, the use of proven behavioral strategies, ways of coping with stress. On the other hand, it encourages a person to move forward: we have a powerful mechanism of joy and satisfaction from our achievements built in. Remember the child who succeeded for the first time in something that had not worked out for a long time. Or play any game with the baby - and you will see how sincerely and directly he rejoices in victory and cries sadly because of the first defeats. And adults are no different, they just have blunted these reactions. But if it is important for a child to learn and consolidate basic skills up to a certain age, then an adult who is able to analyze, predict, vary is simply obliged to expand his own palette of emotions and feelings, to be able to be different, enriching his role roles. This is the path to yourself. And, of course, to success.

Literature:

• 1. Vygotsky L. S. Questions of child psychology. Electronic resource: http://do.gendocs.ru/docs/index-106601.html
• 2. Anderson M. How to get out of the comfort zone. Personal Effectiveness Guide

Editor: Chekardina Elizaveta Yurievna

There is such an old and very correct saying: "The fish is looking for where it is deeper, and the man is looking for where it is better." And this is absolutely correct and natural. Everyone strives to make their life as convenient and enjoyable as possible. More living space, faster car, softer bed, more powerful computer. It would be complete idiocy to refuse these benefits of civilization.

It would seem, well, what's wrong with a calm comfortable existence? You feel relaxed, there are no risks in your life, you are satisfied with the way things are going and you do not feel any need to change anything. Maybe you don't feel incredibly happy, or 100% satisfied, but at least you feel comfortable right?

Almost always, your comfort zone is the product of self-deception. You tell yourself that there is no better alternative to your current position, that you have spent too much effort to build it, that it is already too difficult to change anything in life. You stop at one albeit quite convenient place and with your own hands nullify all the magnificent prospects of your life. The comfort zone becomes the end point of your journey for you. Why is this happening?

you get soft

What happens to a person who is immersed in a bath of warm water for a while? He relaxes, softens. And if such a stay is extended for quite a long time? That's right, it's deteriorating. His muscles lose their tone and very soon he will not only be able to run, but even just stand still.

But it's not just about the body. The same thing happens with our brain.

The lack of the need to solve complex problems leads to a dilution in the head and a loss of clarity of thought, the ability to learn and make decisions.

You become a vegetable that moves on the same trajectory every day and performs the same tasks every day.

Meanwhile, remember what period of your life was the most fruitful and creative for you? I am sure that these were not the most well-fed and comfortable times. Some will remember sleepless student nights, others life-threatening trips and situations, others will remember the crisis periods of their lives, when everything had to be started all over again.

You are giving up on life goals

Everyone, well, almost everyone, a person has somewhere deep in his subcortex that very cherished goal of his life. Yes, something from the "see Paris and die" series. The most interesting thing is that very often these goals are not so sky-high and unattainable. But something always gets in our way.

You may never recognize yourself

There is an opinion, and it is quite justified, that only in difficulties is the true face of a person revealed. You can live your whole life in greenhouse conditions and never know what you are really capable of. Can you really be bold and inventive? Are you really able to show patience and perseverance, or do you just think it is?

It's time to get out of your comfort zone and understand, if only for yourself, what kind of person you really are and where lies the limit of your capabilities. I assure you that the result will surely surprise you.

Sooner or later, the comfort zone for any person turns into a factor that hinders its development and deprives life of the thrill of sensations. Recall the most interesting moments of your life. Surely most of them are connected precisely with those moments when you did something unusual, extreme, going beyond the usual routine. Get out of your comfort zone.

So why not do it again?

You have probably heard more than once that you need to get out of your comfort zone more often, because this is extremely useful for development. But what is a comfort zone and what do we really know about it, except for the following fact:

Caption: On the right is your comfort zone, and on the left is where miracles happen

So, what is a person's comfort zone and why should we get out of it?

In science, the "comfort zone" is defined through the concept of anxiety, namely: "The comfort zone is a type of behavior in which anxiety is kept at a consistently low level." Imagine that you are cooking dinner, driving to work or watching TV: these daily activities do not make you anxious or uncomfortable, you do them automatically, they are your comfort zone. This is what the comfort zone means in psychology.

Sometimes, when people talk about getting out of your comfort zone, they mean “try something new,” but in general, this applies to all situations in which you feel insecure or nervous. So, if you get stuck in a traffic jam on your way to work or you don’t like the fact that the train is crowded with people, then these familiar situations are no longer neutral for you, and you experience discomfort. In this case, why step out of your comfort zone, and what good is that?

While we all strive for pleasurable sensations, a certain level of discomfort can be surprisingly beneficial. Even the smallest inconvenience can push us to finish the work as soon as possible or improve the quality of its implementation.

A 1908 study showed that mice, when faced with very simple tasks, only increased their productivity when their anxiety level increased. When the task turned out to be difficult, the anxiety state helped only to a certain level - after reaching a certain threshold, the combination of complexity and anxiety led to a drop in performance.

The figure above shows that the growth zone is located outside the comfort zone, however, with a significant distance from it, excessive anxiety appears, which can lead to a panic state. This illustration clearly explains the results of the experiment with mice. It is worth thinking about how to get out of your comfort zone with benefit.

How do we behave in the face of uncertainty?

Uncertainty is often the cause of discomfort. You are calm when cooking dinner or driving a car, but only on the condition that you do it every day and know what to expect. However, if you decide to try out a new recipe, get behind the wheel for the first time, or maybe get another job or want to jump out of a parachute, you are provided with anxiety.

Uncertainty can also cause you to react more strongly to negative experiences. Studies have shown that when negative images were preceded by uncertainty, they produced a stronger negative effect than when participants were prepared and knew what to expect.

For the same reason, people tend to react negatively to any change, even if they end up making it themselves. What happens if you step too far out of your comfort zone? American researcher Brené Brown believes that uncertain social, political or economic conditions significantly narrow our comfort zone: the more scared we are, the less we are confident and tomorrow and the more difficult it is to get rid of this condition.

Thus, for the human psyche, striving for familiar and familiar things, any uncertainty is a reason to be wary. From an evolutionary point of view, this behavior is explained by considering familiar situations as safer: “Hey, we tried this and didn’t die. Probably if we try the same thing again, nothing bad will happen.”

Therefore, thinking about the unknown takes a lot of energy, and in case of fatigue or loss of strength, we would rather go the usual way than try something new.

Going beyond

So, how to leave the comfort zone and is it worth it? Is it really good for you? Scientists say yes, but up to certain limits. Like the mice in the experiment, don't stress yourself too much to avoid panicking.

Consider the main benefits of getting out of your comfort zone.

Self-development

A positive attitude and hope for success, combined with some anxiety and self-doubt, can lead you to personal growth. Therefore, sports such as rock climbing or skydiving are often recommended in lists of tips on how to take a person out of their comfort zone: you are nervous and worried, but at the end you have a huge sense of satisfaction that you have done it, and this increases your confidence in yourself.

Expanding your comfort zone

If you have a small comfort zone, that is, there are only a few things that you can do without worry, you risk living your life in fear and missing out on a lot of interesting things. Getting out of your comfort zone more or less regularly, you will gradually increase the number of familiar and familiar situations for you.

In this way, you will be able to enjoy life much more, because well-known things are pleasant in themselves, even if at first we felt uncomfortable in mastering them.

Novelty motivates us and helps us learn

A new experience leads to an increase in the level of dopamine in the brain, which is part of the "reward system". This hormone makes us look for rewards, and new situations increase this craving. Novelty has also been shown to improve our memory and learning abilities by making our brains more flexible.

Daniel H. Pink, author of work on motivation and workflow, in his book Drive: The Surprising Truth About What Makes Us Take Action, says that we all strive for some ideal level of discomfort in which we can to be as productive as possible.

This golden mean when discomfort does not allow you to unnecessarily relax and tones up, without depriving you of the desire or opportunity to work, and there is something worth striving for. By getting used to a little inconvenience, you will successfully expand your comfort zone. Now you know what it means to step out of your comfort zone and how to do it.

How far are you willing to go beyond the usual boundaries? It's up to you. Perhaps, after reading this article, you will decide to try something fundamentally new in life. The most important thing is to maintain a healthy balance between safety and comfort, and then you are guaranteed the pleasure of life's experiments.

Life begins where the comfort zone ends.

Neil Walsh

I fully understood what it means to leave my comfort zone 14 years ago, when I moved to live in America. Because then my whole life was one continuous zone outside of my comfort - new country, foreign language, new acquaintances, new job… Everything is new! However, this step was the beginning of the very life of my dreams, which I live now.

Was it easy for me then? Of course not. Am I glad that I went so far beyond my comfort zone? Of course yes!

I am deeply convinced that it is impossible to achieve your goals and fulfill your dreams, being in the same place, doing the same thing for months and years ... So you can only be disappointed in life and blame everything and everyone around for the fact that something is so and it didn't work.

Therefore, I invite you to the most exciting and interesting "journey" of your life. Where the best is waiting for you. Where do your dreams live? Moreover, you can do it every day - both in everyday affairs and in business. That's what helped me 14 years ago and still helps me expand my comfort zone. Use it to your advantage.

IN CONSCIOUSNESS

1. Determine what is outside your comfort zone.

In other words - understand what exactly you think is worth doing, but you are afraid of it because of the possibility of disappointment or failure? Draw a circle and fill in these things behind the circle. This process will allow you to clearly define not only your fears, but also the limits of your comfort.

2. Decide where you want to go and why.

Take a list of your "inconveniences" and move on. Remember that the primary emotion you want to overcome is fear. How does this fear apply to each situation? Be very specific. Are you afraid of meeting new people? Why? Because you're not sure about the sound of your voice? Are you unsure about your appearance? Or are you afraid of being ignored?

Decide where you want to go and why. For example, if you experience difficulties with communication and contact with new people, your task is to get to know each other more often and make this process habitual and comfortable.

3. Make discomfort comfortable.

In the comfort zone, you know what to expect. If you leave it, you may lose something. But you can also get something. To make this uncertainty comfortable, practice detachment from the outcome. When you decide to do something, do it for the sake of the process itself, and not in order to get a specific result. Focus on the joy of doing.

4. Enjoy the unknown.

When was the last time you felt excited about not knowing what was going to happen next? If you're in your comfort zone, it's probably been a while... It's time to bring that mixture of anticipation and awe back into your life.

5. Be honest with yourself when trying to make excuses.

Don't say, "I just don't have time for this right now." Instead, admit, "I'm afraid to do it." Don't make excuses, just be honest. This way you can better confront what really bothers you and increase your chance of moving forward.

WITHOUT LEAVING HOME

1. Change your space.

The real unplowed field for leaving the comfort zone right in front of you is your home! A rearrangement, new interesting things, or even renovation will help you improve the space around you and feel happier. Start eating other foods for breakfast, make productive changes to your daily routine - let your imagination run wild.

2. Throw away things that have not been used for more than a year.

Walk from one part of the house to another - a closet, a drawer in your desk, shelves ... See if there are objects and things that you haven't used for a year (or that you forgot about a long time ago). Give them to friends who might need them for charity, or just throw them away.

OUTSIDE HOME

1. Create a new environment for yourself.

Start with small changes that pose no real "threat" to your comfort zone. For example, go to a new restaurant, visit an exhibition on the other side of town, or simply take a different route home. This is easy way begin to increase the boundaries of your comfort, which at the same time expand your view of the world.

2. Choose an appropriate environment.

If you want to do something better than before, start talking more to people who are already doing it and start imitating them. It is almost guaranteed that they will begin to influence your behavior. You can even let them decide something for you - a dish in a restaurant, a city for a trip, etc. This way you will discover things about yourself that you may not have noticed before. Let them plan and just follow along.

3. Say "Yes" more often.

Even if you don't feel like you're ready for something, try saying yes anyway. New projects, new assignments, new challenges - embrace them even if you've never done it before. Who knows what results this will lead to and how much it will expand your comfort zone. That's why I so often ask my students to ask themselves the question "What if...?" and take a small step forward. And they are always happy with what is ahead.

Remember - you can't change people or circumstances, but you can change how you react to them. You can also change your life. You can start exercising your confidence and strength daily to move towards your dreams and goals. Try to start today with at least one piece of advice and practice for a few days. Also, don't be afraid to jump into the unknown, for example, in your favorite business. How many people are afraid of change all their lives. They are afraid to leave unloved people, they are afraid to ruin relations with negative friends, they are afraid to start their own business, because it’s scary, because they don’t know how, because they don’t know with whom ... It’s so convenient at an old unloved job. However, any exciting adventure begins with just one step ... and very often it is a step into the unknown.

Personally, I have gained the best experience and learned the greatest lessons in my life and in business, and now I am sharing them in our course on creating a business from scratch - the Academy of Experts, for which, by the way, recruitment for an interview is already open.

In everyday life, a person regularly encounters the fact that in order to achieve a goal, one should do something that one had not previously had to resort to. Most often, the prospect of something new, unknown scares and makes you give up. Someone can't speak in public, someone refuses to start a conversation with strangers. Everyone has a different level of comfort zone, but most are unwilling to leave its limits. Read about how to get out of your comfort zone and what it is.

What is a comfort zone?

The comfort zone is a psychological space in which a person experiences a sense of security based on the possibility of accurately predicting the development of some events.

The literary understanding of this term depends on the context, and in psychotherapy, the comfort zone is most often understood as disguised discomfort. For example, a comfort zone can result from taking tranquilizers or sedatives and painkillers. On the one hand, this is good, since the drugs have lowered the level. However, in this way, if all therapy is based only on symptom-relieving agents, it is possible to achieve the opposite of what is expected. Sooner or later, the usual remedies cease to have a beneficial effect, and then a person may find out that he has launched some kind of disease.

Sometimes a comfort zone is also understood as a complex of all those tricks that people use in order to stop their development at some level, to create conditions in order to protect themselves from signs of unsatisfied needs.

Such phenomena require the most delicate approach. It cannot be said unequivocally that if someone has a comfort zone to which he aspires, in which he feels confident and safe, then this is definitely a bad state, and you need to get out of it.

The decision on how to relate to some experiences and the conditions associated with them, everyone makes himself. It is only necessary to remember that in this world everything is relative, and subjective assessments are not always correct.

If your comfort zone becomes harmful...

There are a number of criteria that can clearly and explicitly indicate that a personal comfort zone has more negative than positive features.

1. The feeling of comfort is associated with an actual or just emerging dependence on something. A person feels good only when he drinks alcohol. He himself can sincerely believe that the main thing is not in them, but in conversations with friends that accompany the libation. But this is for the time being, for the time being, and then it will not be possible to achieve inner comfort without alcohol. The result is quite understandable and logical, and the problem will move to the level of narcology.
2. It is enough to leave a certain place associated with psychological comfort, as a person experiences acute distress. For example, an unpleasant feeling, which has its own mental and physical forms of expression, covers immediately, as soon as someone leaves their apartment.
3. A subjective feeling that some kind of swamp is engulfing, but the criteria for diagnosing depression are not traced. Most often, people are dissatisfied with something, but they find it difficult to explain what exactly. Nothing pleases, anxiety arises, it is difficult to relax and enjoy. This means that the feeling of satisfaction has changed its potential.

Usually they say that the comfort zone is a purely psychological phenomenon that has nothing to do with an easy chair, a floor lamp and pleasant music. This is only partly true, since everything that happens inside is necessarily connected with the environment of the individual, and each person tends to strive for novelty. This desire gives rise to an internal conflict, and at its core the inability to get satisfaction from monotony. And the point here is not that being in a psychological comfort zone is bad in itself, but that sooner or later the limits will be exhausted. The place and behavior that previously gave a sense of harmony will turn into a burden, a swamp that will begin to tighten and cause suffering.

The comfort zone has one more pitfall. It provokes the problem of deficient ability to desire. This state is expressed in the fact that people do not know what they want, they experience difficulties with the formation of specific and clear goals that need to be achieved.

How to get out of the comfort zone if it has become a burden?

The easiest way to get out of this state is to sharply introduce something sharp and bright into your life, to create conditions that will make you look at life differently. It can be a camping trip, martial arts, street art and everything that goes beyond the usual vegetative life in the middle class world, with its exclusively material and explainable values. Much here depends not on what exactly the person will do, but on his attitude.

In the same vein, everything can be considered modern techniques psychotherapy. Of great importance in them is the request, which can be called the goal and methodology for its implementation. It is important that the goal be specific, indicating the nature and significance of the effort.

A query like the title of this article has no significant prospect. It needs to be modified so that it sounds a specific problem that can be solved. It should be related to something that allows you to abstract from the search for black cats in a dark room, but be focused on something meaningful that can captivate and change your priorities. It could be:

• receiving additional education;
• choice of career growth strategy;
• practical search for one's spiritual calling...

This list should not be seen as meant only for motivated and ambitious young people. It can include the search for a soul mate and even repairs in the apartment. The main thing is to this moment time, in this section of his life path, the request would be truly relevant.

These 10 tips will help anyone who is ready to push their limits.

Make changes to your daily routine

No one is saying that having an already familiar daily routine is bad. But, nevertheless, if a person’s comfort zone is very fond of him, and it is not possible to decisively break out of it, this the best way to start. Swap something, make adjustments, add something that has been in the plans for so long. Let the usual daily routine cease to be so.

Make new acquaintances

With a housemate, a classmate or an unknown girl in the library or on the street. Yes, you can still make acquaintances or even friends. Having tried this, a person definitely has nothing to lose.

Sign up for new classes

As a rule, at such events there are a sufficient number of people united by common interests, goals or worldview. To let something like this into your life means to expand both the range of knowledge and interests, and the comfort zone.

Decide on a little trip

Neighboring city, or further. As far as free time and finances allow. The most important thing is not to make clear plans. Let such a short trip be a kind of improvisation. You can see local parks, beautiful places, or, again, make some one-time acquaintances. Setting aside a day or half a day for a walk in unfamiliar places will definitely not be a bad decision.

Increase the amount of physical activity

If earlier it was not at all, then it is worth signing up for a gym or for any classes. If a person is already passionate about sports, then it’s time to increase the load on your body. Sport is both health and good appearance so that in this way you can combine business with pleasure.

cook something new

The Internet, as well as cookbooks, are full of unusual recipes that you have never tried before. If everything is bad with culinary skills, you can stop, for example, on salads. Even among some simple dishes, you can find something exotic for your dinner.

Set a specific goal for the near future

You should determine for yourself a goal that cannot be reached without changing the usual way of life. Whether it is the inner world, or something in the surrounding reality. It is worth thinking about what thoughts have been arising for a long time and imagine how this can be achieved. However, thoughts alone are not enough. It is necessary to determine for yourself the time period for which the goal will definitely be achieved, and make a promise to yourself in this.

Interested in new things

It is worth choosing an area of ​​interest to yourself and start delving into its study. Information can be searched both on the Internet and in books (where there may be some things that cannot be found on the Internet now). If a person engages only in what he is used to and what he likes at a particular moment, he will remain standing in one place. Finding and discovering new things is really important.

Try to improve your hobby skills

Everyone should have at least one hobby that bears fruit in the form of visual results and improved skills. It is worth taking this hobby to a new level. An artist can try his hand at working with other instruments, a musician - in an unusual style or genre. In any case, the expansion of the comfort zone should also affect the results of hobbies.

Now you can safely go and gradually begin to change your life. Sooner or later it has to be done, and the sooner, the easier it is. Living in one place all your life under the same conditions may seem comfortable to someone, but this is just an illusion. Interesting fact: no one regrets after expanding the scope of familiar comfort.