Nigerian Letters of Inheritance. Nigerian letters (a type of internet scam)

I say right away: DIVORCE.

Such letters were especially prevalent in Nigeria, and even before the spread of the Internet, they were distributed by regular mail since the mid-1980s. Nigeria has a notorious reputation for being one of the most corrupt in the world. In terms of income from foreign exchange transactions, fraud is currently ranked fourth in Nigeria. With the advent of the internet "Nigerian letters" have become a household name.
As a rule, the recipient of the letter is asked for help in multi-million dollar transactions, promising solid interest on the amounts. If the recipient agrees, more and more sums of money are lured away from him for fees, bribes, etc. In the worst cases, the victim is asked to semi-legally arrive in Nigeria, where he was either arrested for illegally entering the country and extorted money from him for his release, or abducted from the purpose of obtaining a ransom. Letters are sent on behalf of a former king, president, high-ranking official or millionaire asking for help in banking transactions related to transferring money from Nigeria or another country abroad, receiving an inheritance, etc., allegedly taxed or difficult due to persecution in your home country. Nigerian letters were sent, in particular, on behalf of secretaries, treasurers, and even the wives of Russian millionaires. Another common variant is letters allegedly from a bank employee or from an official who learned about the recent death of a very wealthy person “with the same last name” as the recipient of the letter, with an offer to help in obtaining money from this person's bank account. These letters usually refer to amounts of millions of dollars, and the recipient is promised a considerable percentage of the amounts - sometimes up to 40%.

To the nightingale, a year and a half to two years ago, a letter from "wealthy Nigerian heiress" got one friend of mine. The guy is very skeptical and does not believe in manna from heaven. Communicated out of a pure desire to "bubble" what will happen next. As a result, he completely stopped correspondence after asking to marry and send money for the trip.

FIRST

FROM: Kabelo Manda
Email kabelo_manda2004@yahoo.co.uk
JOHANNESBURG
SOUTH AFRICA

Expensive,

I am G. Cabelo Manda from Liberia. The son of the last Brigadier John Manda now lives in South Africa, I got your contact from a business directory here in South Africa and to me on behalf of my widowed Mother Mrs. Mary Manda and my sister, I decided to contact you for help to transfer (move ) the amount of US $ 25.5m (Twenty Five Million Five Hundred Thousand, United States Dollars) inherited from my last father into your personal or company account. Before my fathers died, he was in charge of the arms and purchase of ammunition for the Liberian Armed Forces. In his, WILL ?, he definitely pulled (drew) my attention to this amount
US $ 25.5M which he deposited in a safe private box
Security company in South Africa in my name (name).

ACTUALLY MY FATHER SAID IN HIS ?? And I WILL INDICATE :? My beloved son, I wish to draw (draw) your attention to the amount of US $ 25.5M (Twenty Five Million Five Hundred Thousand United
Declares Dollars) which I put in a box with a security company in Johannesburg South Africa. During the course of the war, I was very dedicated and committed to winning the war against the Rebels until I figured out that senior army officials and top Government functionaries were busy helping themselves with Government Funds and properties and sending them to foreign countries. Because of this, when I and the former Special Adviser to the President we were appointed by the President (President Charles Taylor) to buy arms (weapons) from South Africa, we saw it as a golden opportunity and rejected the money we split and I got total AMERICAN Dollars 25.5 Million. In the event of my absence on earth, caused by death only, you must contact a reliable foreign partner to help you transfer (move) this money from South Africa for investment purposes. I have deposited money in your title (name) and you can claim it alone with the deposit code. Your mother has all the documents. Take good care of our small family. From the above, you will understand that the lives and future of my family depend on this money, and I will also be very grateful if you can help us. We now live in South Africa as South African Asylum Seekers and Financial Laws do not allow Asylum Seekers some financial rights to do so. great amount money. Because of this, I cannot invest this money in South Africa; hence I ask you to help me transfer this money from South Africa for investment purposes. For your assitance, I am prepared to offer you 40% of the total funds and 60% will be reserved for me and my family. Please contact me with the above email address if you are intrested to assit us and please, the confidentiality of this transaction is highly needed.

Best regards,

G. Cabelo Manda (for the family).

SECOND

Have a nice day. Sorry for God's sake for what I decided to write to you. Believe me, I have a hopeless situation. Disabled Alexey Prosenyuk is writing to you from Tbilisi. I am 36 years old with me in 1999. there was an accident, I got into a car accident, 3 people died on the spot, and I miraculously survived. The doctors spent half a year in the hospital to remove 3 blood clots, but 2 still remain deep in the brain. They interfere with the normal access of blood to the brain, so I cannot talk and cannot move without assistance. I have the same situation in which Nikolai Karachentsev found himself, but unlike him, I do not have the funds to do the operation. This is possible at the Institute. Burdenko. The fact is that I have no relatives at the moment I live with strangers who sheltered me who themselves are in dire need of almost everything, because there is no work and is not expected in the near future. I was taken out! I have to live on the street for a long time. Wherever I have not turned for help, but everywhere the answer is the same, sorry, but we can not help. The people I live with have a computer that is really very old, but you can write letters, so I decided to write, maybe someone can provide a little help, because I need to do a computed tomography of the brain so that doctors can prescribe at least some kind of treatment, because my life is unbearable, I can’t talk, I can’t sit or sleep normally. Constant pains have been tormenting me for 6 years. You can imagine him what my life is like. I ask you, I beg you for Christ's sake, help me if you have the opportunity. If necessary, I can send a copy of certificate N-27 confirming my current state, unfortunately I have no other documents. Thank you in advance, I look forward to hearing from you.
Good luck in health and well-being to you and your loved ones. God bless you.
The hand of the giver will not fail.

This is not a scam or just another swindle. I really need your help. You can contact me by e-mail pros@pisem.net or tel. + 995-93-16-84-86
Ask Anna this is the woman with whom I now live, because it is very difficult for me to speak.

Regards, Alexey.

The entire Internet marvels at the resourcefulness of the Chelyabinsk resident, who managed to fool an international swindler. A 28-year-old man posted on his blog a story about how he got the so-called “ nigerian letter". This is a common type of scam: the victim receives a message from Africa in which they offer to divide the inheritance or participate in financial transaction... The man, blinded by the prospect of wealth, agrees, and the swindlers extort money from him.

I received a letter from sunny Togo from a lawyer named Hanson Dugbe, - writes Alexander, - he offered me to saw off the inheritance of his late client, who, by a lucky chance, turned out to be my namesake. The client himself died in a car accident. He has no children or grandchildren, but he has a stash in a bank in the amount of $ 8,500,000. For about fifteen minutes I was in a state of euphoria, I felt like a real dollar millionaire. But then I still came to my senses and decided to look for information about this Hanson and his office. And he, of course, turned out to be a famous swindler.

The blogger decided to teach the swindler a lesson and entered into a correspondence with him. To convince the victim, the lawyer sent Alexander copies of the death certificate of his namesake, his own passport and lawyer's license. The kindest chocolate uncle smiled from the photo, well, how can such a person deceive!

The fraudster and the victim exchanged documents for two weeks, the Chelyabinsk citizen filled out some bank questionnaires. And Dugbe now and then added fuel to the fire of their international friendship. Mr. Hanson addressed his counterpart exclusively as "brother Alexander", and was even going to come to visit and present an African shirt.

And now the "deal" has reached its climax. The African asked to send $ 780. This is where Russian ingenuity came in handy.

V reply letter I began to mow like a fool, - says Alexander, - dear Hanson, I wrote, my wife says that this is all a fraud, and does not give me money. Hansonchik, dear, could not send me some symbolic amount on his own behalf, say, 10 dollars, so that my wife would make sure that you are not a swindler.

A few hours later, the Chelyabinsk citizen woke up phone call from an unknown number. It was Hanson himself!

Brother, ”he said in English,“ I sent you 10 bucks through Western Union.

Indeed, at the bank, Alexander was given a crisp green note with the first US Treasury Secretary Alexander Hamilton. As a decent swindler, after that our homegrown Bender never got in touch with Hanson anymore.

I will leave this banknote as a souvenir, ”the savvy blogger told Komsomolskaya Pravda,“ and Hanson then wrote me a letter in which he called me and my wife scammers, he was very offended.

REFERENCE "KP"

Nigerian letters are a type of scam that dates back to the 80s. From Nigeria and countries with a large Nigerian diaspora around the world, letters were sent out in which people were offered to saw the inheritance of a namesake or distant relative, or to help transfer an amount of money from one account to another. There are many options for legends: from proposals profitable work abroad before a fictitious marriage with an African princess for the sake of a millionth dowry. In any case, the victim gets nothing. With the advent of the Internet, millions, if not billions of these emails have been sent out by email.

2003-2018

In January, Russian e-mail recipients received offers to get hold of several million dollars for free much more often than usual. We are talking about the world famous "Nigerian Post", or "Deception 419". Previously, computers of any Russian company received two or three emails per year, then just last week users received a dozen "business proposals". The Izvestia correspondent tried to get rich quickly, and at the same time to find out the reasons for such a keen interest of deceivers from hot Africa in Russia.

Have you ever fished out a letter from your email inbox with the heading "Urgent. Strictly confidential. Need help"? For example, the unfortunate Bruno Guei from Benin tells how his father, a wealthy farmer from Cote d'Ivoire, was killed in September 2002 during the military conflict, and the orphan had a problem: it is necessary to withdraw 21 million dollars from the country. his bank account to transfer, then he will get a quarter of the wealth.

It is a pity to tears and the widow Victoria Savimbi from Angola, whose husband died, leaving her 15 million dollars in Dutch investment fund... The money must be transferred to a safe place for a reward of 15 percent of the amount.

We received letters from both the former chief accountant of the United Bank of West Africa, who pocketed 30 million "green", and from the former Nigerian Minister of Health Isama Obi, who combined charitable activities with the management of the Special Oil Fund and saved 18 million dollars.

But perhaps the most well-grounded proposal came from London from Mr. Denis Daniel, who proposed to scrape 18 million from Freetown of Dr. Mbonga, the former Sierra Leonean finance minister. Firstly, the letter won over with a detailed listing of the laws of the African republic, according to which money could not be transferred in any way, except through our accounts. And secondly, not only a faceless email was given for feedback, but also a real London fax number (code 44-207). We fell for this proposal.

An hour later, we were offered to send detailed accessories of the bank account through which the transfer will go. The only account whose number I knew was my mother-in-law's retirement account at the Zelenograd branch of Sberbank. All that remains is to add the SWIFT (international number) of Sberbank, which I was kindly prompted by phone. Mr. Daniel was completely satisfied with the bill.

I have never seen so many official bank papers with eagles, lions and rhinos in logos. All this I received by fax within two days. The papers with the beautiful names "affedevit" and "invoice" confirmed that I should receive 18 million in my mother-in-law's account, keep 3 million for myself, and the rest of the money should be transferred to the account of an offshore bank registered in the state of Antigua and Barbuda. The only thing I needed to do was to transfer $ 1,000 to these distant islands for opening an account and another $ 2,000 for the services of a lawyer. That's the whole scam. And the most amazing thing is that thousands of people fall for this simple deception.

Nobody in Russia keeps statistics of those deceived by "Nigerian letters". But in the USA, England, Canada and other countries, special organizations are working on this. Susan Grant, director of America's Internet Fraud Watch program, told us that 2,600 people fell victim to such schemes last year. Moreover, 16 Americans parted with 345 thousand dollars, two lost 70 thousand each. The total number of losses from the "Nigerian Post" during the entire period of its operation amounted to $ 100 million in America. And this despite the fact that the world has spent 5 million to inform people about African swindlers!

Until 1996, mail arrived in regular letters; in the last five years, this garbage has filled the Internet, including the Russian one. As the Internet provider Sergey Zakrevsky told us, in January, Nigerian letters began to fall into mailboxes. Russian users The Internet is hundreds of times more frequent than before. Our specialists try to explain this fact by the fact that last year Russian e-mail addresses became much more accessible to machines sending spam ("electronic garbage"). But Western experts on the "Nigerian Post" have a different opinion on this matter.

Another name of the "Nigerian Post" - "Cheat 419" - according to the number of the corresponding article of the Nigerian Penal Code. One of the organizations fighting deceivers is called the Coalition 419. Her Executive Director Martin Brewer believes that the transfer of the activity of deceivers to Russia is due precisely to the fact that no one is fighting this phenomenon in our country. And Cheat 419's seasonal spike Russian Internet due to the fact that on February 13, the intergovernmental organization for financial control FATF will consider the status of Nigeria and some other African countries in the "black lists", so there began a real fight against electronic fraudsters, and they are afraid to fool Westerners who have much to complain about. Therefore, deceivers from the banks of the Niger and Limpopo will look for fools on the banks of the Ob and Volga. Do you think they will find it?

Help from the author of the site

The so-called "Scam 419" began in the early 1980s. At that time, "Nigerian letters" came in ordinary envelopes or faxes, and its victims were primarily citizens of the United States of America. Simultaneously with the advent of the Internet and e-mail, "Nigerian" spam also appeared. In the early 90s, African swindlers "discovered" Russia.

Nigeria is a potentially wealthy country. There is oil, many other valuable minerals, a developed tropical Agriculture, cheap work force, which makes this country attractive for investment. Therefore about the main "income" crooks receive not from individuals, but from businessmen, who can be offered to buy cheap Nigerian oil, some other no less "true" contract for tens of millions of dollars, huge commissions for intermediation, and so on. etc.

Thousands of such letters are sent from Nigeria every month around the world. The addresses and phone numbers of the firms are taken from advertising brochures, are mined in embassies, copied from reference books and telephone books. A certain percentage of recipients swallows the bait and enters into correspondence. The potential victim is then invited to Nigeria for negotiations, during which she must personally, on the spot, make sure of the seriousness of the partner. Negotiations can even take place at the premises of a ministry, the Central Bank or an oil corporation. The performance is played out as if by notes, with honed skill. There are many options. They may be asked to pay upfront costs for officials' services, transfer taxes, various fees, or something like that. Having pumped out from several thousand to several million from the client, the partners disappear. There are cases when intractable people were intimidated, beaten and even killed. Often the victim is asked to come to Nigeria without a visa (in this case, the passport is taken at the airport), to enter through a neighboring country, or not to inform the embassy about his arrival. These are all sure signs of cheating.

The profits from this scam are fantastic: according to the US Embassy in Lagos, the annual "milk yield" of international class Nigerian scammers from Western businessmen - from Americans to Japanese, from Norwegians to Brazilians - reaches several hundred billion (!) dollars ("Business in Nigeria", Kommersant newspaper No. 127 from 07/11/95, but I think this is a typo - more real than "millions"). The investigation is being carried out by organizations from the FBI to Interpol. But the thing is that the very fact of sending a letter is not a crime. Everything else takes place in Nigeria, where ends are almost impossible to find. As the American magazine Time wrote in 2004, not a single dollar of the stolen millions was returned. Escorting robbed and intimidated compatriots to the airport has become one of the routine duties of Western diplomats. More and more often, employees of the consular department of the Russian embassy have to do this.

According to the Internet, this scam is the third largest industry in Nigeria, and it has never been possible to snatch money stolen under the 419 scheme from Nigerian banks. This suggests that the 419 Scam is at some level with administrative support. And according to special decree No. 419, providing for a solid prison term for fraud, for all the years of its action, only a few have been convicted.

Interview with a Nigerian scammer

Part one.

"Nigerian swindler" arrested in the US

Compulenta, 26.12.2006

The American authorities managed to arrest one of the Nigerian swindlers in the state of Texas. Femi Ikuopenikan, 35, confessed to helping his "colleagues" steal $ 115,000 from the two brothers. According to the FBI, Femi is part of a group of so-called "Nigerian spammers".

In particular, in a specific episode, the scammers convinced one of the brothers that they would give him $ 6.7 million if he transferred a certain amount via the Internet to an account in a non-existent bank, Hallmark Trust Financial. Having become interested in the tempting offer, the second brother soon joined the correspondence with the spammers.

The American authorities rarely get the opportunity to bring fraudsters to justice, as they tend to work abroad and carefully conceal their identity. Icuopenican will be sentenced in February. He faces up to five years in prison and a $ 250,000 fine.

BELARUS GAVE 260 THOUSAND DOLL. FOR "NIGERIAN PRINCES IN NEED"

Gazeta.Ru, 29.04.2007

Employees of the Ministry of Internal Affairs of Belarus, together with colleagues from Great Britain and Nigeria, are searching for Internet fraudsters who stole more than 260 thousand dollars from a Belarusian businessman.

Igor Chernenko, the head of the department for solving crimes in the sphere of high technologies of the Ministry of Internal Affairs of the republic, told reporters that the attackers had sent so-called "Nigerian letters" to the businessman's personal computer. In these messages, they asked the entrepreneur to transfer a certain amount of money to help certain Nigerian princes in trouble, for which they promised a large reward in the future.

To carry out the criminal plan, the scammers invited a Belarusian businessman to London, where they created a pseudo-office for him and stole a large sum of money from his account.

Chernenko said that this is not the only victim of the "Nigerian letters" in Belarus, saying that last year two "compassionate women from Minsk" sent $ 20,000 to the accounts of Internet scammers for the same "needy Nigerian princes."

The head of the department warned that mailings about the search for millions of Saddam Hussein had already begun to appear on the Internet, and urged the population of Belarus not to fall for the tricks of fraudsters who trade on the Internet.

What are Nigerian Letters of Happiness?

... Nigerian letters are a common form of fraud, most developed with the advent of mass mailings by e-mail (spam). The letters are named so because this type of fraud was especially widespread in Nigeria, moreover, even before the spread of the Internet, when such letters were distributed by regular mail. However, Nigerian letters also come from other African countries, as well as from cities with a large Nigerian diaspora (London, Amsterdam, Madrid, Dubai). Mailing of letters began in the mid-1980s. In 2005, Nigerian spammers were awarded the Anti-Nobel Prize for Literature.

As a rule, fraudsters ask the recipient of the letter for help in multi-million dollar transactions, promising substantial interest on the amounts. If the recipient agrees to participate, large sums of money are gradually lured away from him, allegedly for the execution of transactions, payment of fees, bribes to officials, and then fines ...

And here's another funny excerpt, this time from the site Argumenty.ru -

... On the first wave of "Nigerian letters", only the Americans lost $ 5 billion. The total amount of losses from such letters around the world amounted to $ 10 billion. Australians, for example, lose about $ 36 million a year. One of the Belarusian businessmen lost 200 thousand dollars. The Russians must be given their due, they not only do not fall for such proposals, but, having come into contact with the authors of the letters, often give us data that helps to find traces of criminals. True, we must state with regret that among the fraudsters who have now begun to conduct a massive attack on Russia, according to preliminary data from the investigation, first of all, graduates Russian University Friendship of Peoples named after Patrice Lumumba. This is indicated not only by the peculiarities of linguistics in Russian-language "Nigerian letters", but also by a rather careful selection of their victims - representatives of small, but rising, and medium-sized businesses. Computer databases of such "clients" are illegally sold in Moscow and other large cities of Russia. Interior Ministry officials and tax officials are looking for sources of information leakage from their departments, but so far unsuccessfully ...

Interpol officials warn that the “Nigerian mailing list” has grown sharply in the wake of the global financial crisis. In the hope that some will treat the "legacy" that has fallen from the sky as a lifeline. It got to the point that in some letters they ask to send not three thousand dollars, but at least a hundred. And one more alarming statistic: if at the beginning of the year three or four applications a month were received from Russians about the receipt of "Nigerian letters", now their number exceeds a dozen a week ...

The scheme by which scammers always work

First of all, it must be emphasized that crooks count on the combination of human stupidity and greed, and they find fertile ground. Therefore, in most cases, I personally do not feel sorry for the victims of African spam. Well, please tell me, what sane person would think of answering a letter of this kind -

... I am compelled to turn to you with the hope that you will come into my position and understand the urgent need for your assistance, as well as preserve the confidentiality that this case requires. My name is Fred Williams and I am the son of Salim Williams, a former defense secretary who was killed for resisting arrest during a coup in Guinea-Bissau. Due to persecution by the government, I was forced to flee to Cote d'Ivoire, where my father's deposit contains $ 21.8 million, according to my father's will, money can be withdrawn from the account only with the help of his foreign partner. , they do not know this partner ... As a partner, I chose you for your honesty ... Name the percentage of the total amount you are counting on and send your Bank details so that we can split the money ...

Fraudsters almost always send their messages on behalf of the crown princes, ministers of the disgraced African republics, fugitive oligarchs and always with constant requests for assistance in banking transactions related to the transfer of money from Africa to Asia. The schemes are absolutely banal, and to some extent I am even embarrassed for opponents who are unable to come up with anything more original. To be more convincing, they send you your money, which awaits you in Nigeria in incredible quantities -

If the victim of the letter responds to a cunning swindler, then several scans of “documents” are sent to him, allegedly confirming the legitimacy of the transaction and the honesty of your opponents. We are always talking about handicraft forgeries made by a person who is absolutely not familiar with Photoshop. Black brothers and sisters, piously worshiping the power of paper, fill you with their artisanal works of the Photoshop genre, trying to impress you.

Small collection of selected "trophies" (double click to view) -

... An African alchemist was detained in Yekaterinburg. True, he did not work with gold and lead, but with paper and foreign exchange. Cameroonian citizen Tombu Eric Hilton told local businessmen that he has the secret of converting money into paper and vice versa. Surprisingly, there were people who wanted to test the wonderful skill of the Cameroonian. He claimed that he had money, but they were in the form of so-called candy wrappers, that is, ordinary paper. And in order for this money to turn into its usual state, exactly the same amount of real money is needed. By folding and processing with the appropriate chemical reagents, these candy wrappers allegedly turned, according to the fraudster, into money. Here is one such person fell for the trick of this swindler. One of the Yekaterinburg residents, an entrepreneur who laid out 10 thousand euros, as a result, became a victim of this scammer. A lot of this story is still to be found out by the investigating authorities. In the temporary detention center, he said: "Tell everyone that I will be back soon" ...

Who are the Scambites?

From the English words "scam" and "byter", that is, beating swindlers. With the growing number of Africans involved in Internet piracy, there have appeared those who are fighting them using their own methods. It is enough to enter the number “419” in Google and you will see dozens and hundreds of scambite sites. Those who like to make fun of crooks communicate with each other on the forums, share the email addresses from which spam comes from. And then they play with crooks without rules, creating the appearance of easy money. As a result, the fraudster spends a lot of time and effort on you, without getting anything in return.

And scambites have the concept of trophies of war. For example, you managed to boggle the head of a swindler so much that he is ready for any of your whims in order to get money from you. For example, you suddenly write that you are 100% Muslim and are ready to send money only for the construction of a mosque. The swindler immediately forgets that he is the Crown Prince of Guinea and a devout Catholic, and is ready to accept Mohammedanism -

But even this is not enough for you, and you demand not only a receipt confirming the acceptance of Islam, but also a change of name in the passport. And the swindler, forgetting that he is a masculine person, sends you a scan of a woman's passport that was stolen in the open spaces of the network, while spoiling it with the inept possession of Photoshop (note how the name and surname are clumsily entered) -

To increase and evaluate the skill of African Photoshop lovers, double-click

Here the black swindler apologizes to Zhorik Miloslavsky for not responding to letters for a long time

There are many opportunities to harass crooks - it all depends on your imagination. If you are a Catholic, you demand to convert to Orthodoxy and send a certificate from the Russian Orthodox Church if he is a Muslim - you demand to accept Judaism, from a Jew - to accept Buddhism. A woman has to have an operation and become a man and send a photo. You can demand to send photos of relatives, electricity bills (if you are asked for money to create a fund to help refugees from Congo). At the same time, you are distrust itself, you are a grumbler and sinister in the eyes of crooks. Either you don’t like the quality of the scan, then you don’t answer for a week (there is still work to be done besides games!), Then you find an annoying typo in their “documents”. And so on ad infinitum. As a result, the impatience of the black brothers reaches a boiling point and they break out into rudeness and threats - this is a victory, an unconditional victory!

Examples of jokes on black rags

Depending on what they write to you, you make an insidious laugh at your black brothers and sisters. To a lonely girl who is looking for love and who accidentally found your profile on a dating site (you actually have no profiles!), You write the following:

... Dear Mauren,
Unfortunately I "m lesbian and I" m 100% muslim. Why do you address me this message? I "m searching for a lesbian person betrayed by all heart and soul in ALLAH.
Are you lesbian? Are you muslim?
p.s I wear men "s clothes, that" s why some ppl think I "m male yes ...

Offering you a super bank loan favorable terms(before asking to send him 3000 dollars!) you answer -

... Dear Walter,
OK, you compel me to tell you something intimate about me. Mrs Choo is not a woman. His real name is Larry Bukhari, and he is my boyfriend. Yes I "m homosexual. Surely I trust him and he can use my mail box. However, I" ve been too much angry to discover, that Larry used my email without my permition.
Are you satisfied now? Can we continue? ...

To those who offer you a job in the Emirates, you inform that you suffer from AIDS and have already re-infected all your partners, and moreover, you express your desire to continue in the same spirit -

...Dear Sir,
Please advice me, what to write about my age? I "m 55 years old. Some banks and funds ignore such an elderly persons. The problem is that they think I have no chance to find a new job. My health is not too good yes, because when I was younger i" ve got AIDS. All my wifes passed away because of my lethal sickness, but I still living because I believe in GOD.
Please reply ...

I am offered to fill out a questionnaire for a loan of 25 million Ghanaian kedis, and in it, in addition to the standard full name, there is the question "sex", that is, your gender. How would you answer this question? Seems so simple? Not really! Here's how to turn a conversation around -

... Dear David,
Please help me! I feel confused about this very personal question "Sex". What do you expect me to write over there? The problem is that I had no sexual relations for about 5 years, since my ex-gilfriend heavily damaged my genitals. She cut off half of my penis with a knife, it was terrible !!! All because I loved her collegue without a police permit. In our country, Bukharia, you need a special permit from the police in order to have sexual ralations with a woman.
Do I need to write about it? ...

And here's another option. Do you think loving hearts can be separated by gender reassignment surgery? Let's get a look -

... Dear Dennis,
Are you male of female? To say the truth, I feel no difference because I "m bi-sexual. I was born as a woman, however, later I changed my sex in the name of GOD. After the operation I look like a male, my only problem is unstable potention since my penis was taken from another person who was killed during the civil war in Afghanistan.
I ask for your great patience and love, since I "m not such a usual person to fall in love with. Is it OK with you?
Yours ...

Perhaps these games are time-consuming?

Not at all. It's like ICQ on your computer. You are busy with business, and if you just want to distract yourself from work, you raise the window with the black brothers and watch. What's new? Oh great, Mr. Bumba answered you and sent you a photo of his runaway daddy, the Prince of Rwanda? Fine, but not if this whole family converts to Hinduism, and the photograph is of poor quality - either a prince or a princess? Hah!

Routine

Okay, I’ll take care of booking a flight from Port of Portugal to Madrid at the end of January, and then from Madrid to Paris. The fact is that Ryanair changed the schedule for my flight from Porto to Paris, notifying me of this 2 weeks before departure. And now the plane flies 6 hours earlier, which is absolutely unacceptable for a number of reasons. They are ready to return the money, which I have already used, but now I have to look for alternative flight options. Mdda.