The best way to motivate a child to knowledge. Learning is easy

Parenting is a rather complicated process that requires certain knowledge and skills. It is not enough to give birth to a child, feed, clothe and send to a good educational institution, it is also important to make every effort to educate a full-fledged subject of society. For many parents, the issue of teaching children is quite difficult, because it is necessary that the child be literate and erudite. Very lucky are those parents whose child himself is looking for new knowledge, likes to do homework and devotes a lot of time to reading books. However, more and more often children do not want to study, and they spend all their free time on computer games and communication with peers.

Of course you can just limit access to a computer and the Internet, but it is unlikely that by doing so you will instill a child's love for lessons. Here it is necessary to approach the solution of the issue more intelligently.

Motivation- this is the very driving force that makes a person work on himself and realize his plans. If you want your child to study well and have a craving for science, then he must be properly motivated.

1. Pay Attention What subject do you like the most in school? In any case, there is something that will be interesting even to the most lazy and passive kid. It is from this subject that it is worth starting from. Enroll your child in courses, work with him at home and praise any progress in this direction. This will give the child self-confidence and arouse interest in other subjects.

2. Always talk to kid that he is the best, and the best cannot bring bad grades in the diary. Of course, your son or daughter may begin to resist and defiantly ignore your words, but believe me, even now your words are deposited on the subconscious of the child, and at an older age this will grow into rivalry with excellent students. With your reproaches and insults because of the child’s poor grades, you can only lower his self-esteem, and you need to convince him that he is very smart and successful.

3. Come up with a good reward for academic achievement. Buy your child's favorite treat, take them to see an interesting cartoon or movie, or go to a cafe together. Thus, the child will develop a desire to earn for himself the various joys of life. Such motivation will be an excellent contribution to the future of the child, because from an early age he will know that in order to get something good, you need to work hard.

4. Tell your child bad examples of families without education who live in poverty. Of course, not everyone works by profession, but it is the school and the institute that form the personality, develop logical thinking and provide an opportunity to express themselves. The child must understand that without a good education and a large amount of knowledge, he may simply not be able to cope with the various complexities of life. Even if today you provide him well, he must understand that mom and dad are not eternal, therefore it is important to be able to earn money yourself.

5. Psychologists proved that fathers are the best motivated to learn. The thing is that the desire to achieve career growth must be instilled. There are cases when a child himself can dream of development in the profession since childhood, but, most often, this is the merit of the parents. If the father is successful at work, then he should demonstrate this to his child as effectively as possible and try to convey all the enthusiasm. Of course, there are a huge number of women who develop their own business, and children also take an example from them in this business, but most often it is the fathers who are gambling and it is they who demonstrate their success because of their desire to climb a step higher in the career ladder. If a dad conveys the idea to his son or daughter in time that it is necessary to get an education in order to earn good money and be interesting to others, then there is a high probability of successful motivation of the child to learn.

6. Provide your children material base for comfortable learning. For many parents, it is very unclear how notebooks, pens and a beautiful desk can affect the quality of a child's knowledge. In fact, this is true, because it gives aesthetic pleasure and is an incentive to action. For example, a child will fill in a beautiful diary much more accurately and attentively, and it will be much more pleasant for him to chop off his things in a new stylish backpack. In private schools and lyceums, learning is much more efficient, not only because of the professionalism of the teachers, but also because the classrooms are very light and comfortable. That is why invite your child to earn good marks, for example, in mathematics and literature, in order to get new notebooks with the image of their favorite cartoon characters.

7. Communicate to your child the idea that quality knowledge is not a need to obey parents, but an opportunity to achieve success in the future and become self-sufficient. In no case do not show aggression and do not put pressure on your baby, but as often as possible say that knowledge will be a great opportunity to prove yourself in life and achieve success both in work and in your personal life.

8. Required morally support the child if he got a bad mark at school, otherwise he will just give up next time and stop fighting for academic success. Be sure to discuss with him why this situation turned out and how all this could have been avoided. Thus, the child will learn to analyze his successes and failures and the next time he will not be afraid to stumble.

9. Manifest maximum constructive criticism in relation to your child's learning process. This means that you should always be aware of how the child is doing at school or college. Comment on all the assessments and actions of teachers, do not be afraid to show the child that he is wrong in some way, but also do not be silent if the reason for his poor assessment was the incompetence of teachers. Always focus on how your child's school day went and ask him about the details so that he knows that you are not indifferent to his successes and failures.

If a child does not want to study, if he is bored and lazy, this becomes a big problem for parents. How to activate magical motivation and help your child enjoy learning? - let's try to figure it out! After all, when a child runs to the music room on his own or sits down for lessons on time, this not only saves parental nerves, but also allows the student to achieve better results. Actually the best.

When the brain is excited

Neuropsychologists have their own story about where happiness comes from. Imagine our brain: crowds of neurons, chemical agents scurrying between them, blood vessels and electrical impulses. When a person starts some activity, the area in the cerebral cortex that is responsible for this activity is activated. Let's say a boy plays football: he knows how to hit the ball, take the pass, he actively and joyfully exchanges signals with other players - in a word, he is at ease. A well-developed “football” section of the cortex is actively turned on in his brain, cells are washed with fresh blood, electric discharges run thickly, stimulating substances are released, new neural connections are woven, everything shines, sparkles, pulsates, like on a holiday - and subjectively it is experienced as a drive. , happiness and meaningfulness.

And here is another boy: he also plays football, but at the same time he secretly dreams of going home to glue tanks as soon as possible, he hits the ball weakly and awkwardly, the players slap him for his dullness, and the coach frowns with displeasure. At this time, the “football” zone of the cortex, of course, turns on and comes to life, but the signals through it are weak and scattered, stress substances are released, and the “pro-tanchiki” cortex is constantly trying to seize the lead. And subjectively, the boy experiences this as irritation, boredom and a waste of time. There is little happiness in this, not to mention the meaning: it may seem to the boy that there is nothing more stupid than taking the ball from each other on the field.

The good news is that even an activity that is not very favorite makes the brain work and release energy to a person for actions. This means that he has a chance to find bright and inspiring moments in his affairs (for example, when hitting the ball will work out better and better) - to become happier and want to develop further. The most unhappy people, from the point of view of brain biochemistry, are bored idlers who do not know how to entertain themselves and how to keep themselves busy. They lie or loiter around, looking for at least some incentives and entertainment to overcome the excruciating boredom. This condition is unfamiliar to young children, but sadly, by adolescence, many girls and boys fall into apathy and begin to be lazy.

There is a myth that a person has a “magic box” - a reserve of energy that can be spent or saved - and then there will be more energy “for oneself” and “for pleasure”. In fact, scientists say, forces come to us like milk to a nursing mother: while the mother is feeding the baby, she has milk, but as soon as the baby is weaned, milk production gradually stops. The same thing happens with the amount of energy that the brain releases to us for action: while we are active (and best of all, we do things with pleasure), we have strength, but as soon as we give up work, strength and happiness become less and less. Of course, rest is necessary, and workaholics suffer no less than idlers, falling into the other extreme. But all the same, it is the various interesting work with the head, body and soul that gives happiness, sympathy for oneself and a feeling of fullness of life - when during the day the whole brain is included in the work, sparkling and pulsing like a Christmas tree. And just this feeling of happiness and drive can be an excellent incentive for development and motivation for learning.

How does happiness help learning?

Now let's ask a tricky question about boys and football: which of the heroes of our history will achieve the best results? Who will work harder and grow on themselves? It would seem that the answer is obvious, and the first successful boy will soon become the star of the stadiums, and the second will crawl back to his tanks with a mixture of shame and relief.

But here an important word comes into play - proactivity. It is based on a strong-willed decision and a lively interest: "I myself, I want, I will do it, I need to." Many mothers freeze nervously, remembering the crisis of three years, negativism and harmful children's “I myself!” on the case and not on the case - but this is how the children's will begins to manifest itself. And if you let it get stronger, then it will lead to success. When a child imperceptibly makes a decision: “I will play football, learn to ride a skateboard, I will play in the theater, I like it, I want it, mine,” then he almost won. Then his interest may change, he will switch from the theater to vocal lessons (and he has every right to do so), but it is the perseverance of will and passion that help to grow and develop in the chosen business.

The difficulty is that proactivity is turned on only from the inside. Mom and dad can praise as much as they like, promise to give a tablet and a puppy for five at a music school, but if the child does not want to study on his own, then his results will be average, and interest in the lesson will fade very quickly, even if the child has abilities. But it happens that a strange thing happens: one day the child himself begins to receive joy and buzz from his occupation. He himself suddenly hears that "Cat's House" on the piccolo flute sounds stunning, he wants more, he sees the meaning in this, his self-esteem is growing! He plays “There was a birch in the field” and is simply thrilled by his power. This is how “I myself, I want and I will” turn on - and often this is like an avalanche. So the child goes to success, to independence and relieves the parents of the painful obligation to force the child to study day after day (well, except to support and warm up).

The joke is that proactivity sometimes kicks in under mysterious circumstances. For example, our boy-with-tanks can stay in football out of harmfulness and perseverance, or out of a desire to please a girl, or out of rivalry with a friend - and gradually get involved and learn to get so much pleasure and drive from classes that he will become the best. Of course, parents can make attempts to help the child find his magical path: introduce him to various interesting topics, show exciting films, take him to exhibitions, to sports competitions, to scientific laboratories ... In other words, to create a rich, emotionally and intellectually rich environment around the child. a field so that the child has something to cling to with his mind and heart. This is very similar to “dancing with a tambourine”, but sometimes it works (although often proactivity is turned on, rather, contrary to parental efforts).

So, for example, a modern world-famous chemist Artem Oganov says that his interest in chemistry woke up at the age of four, when he “accidentally” found an excellent children's book on chemistry in the closet, which his mother put there. Mom offered her sons different topics, carefully watched what they would respond to vividly, and helped them grow in this direction. The mother of another famous "boy" - Boris Grebenshchikov tried to show him the most interesting things that she herself encountered - books, music, theatrical performances, classes in creative studios - and also followed her son's interests.

It turns out that the best thing a parent can do is to provide the child with a variety of incentives, give him freedom of choice and carefully monitor the child. If we see that the child has turned on, is happily immersed in the topic, his eyes are shining and the gears are spinning - cheers, good luck! - We support and help the movement. The recipe for willpower suppression and a proactive start is also simple: control the child more, follow him on his heels and choose activities for him to your taste, sadly whine about duties and suppress the initiative.

How comfort discourages learning

The ideal of a prosperous and developed child lives in the minds of parents for many years. He was raised in love and protected from mental trauma, helped to develop different abilities, taken to a concert in sliders, chose the best school, hired tutors ... GW on demand and co-sleeping smoothly flow into English with a native speaker and leadership training. At the same time, psychologists say that in adolescence, prosperous children with whom they have worked too much often fall into apathy and do not want anything. Just like the "golden youth" often have diagnoses of "depression + various addictions."

And here again I want to repeat the maxim: only one's own activity gives a stable feeling of happiness and motivation for development. Parents sometimes want to give their child a good start so much that they load him with responsibility and very useful activities, help him learn languages, master sciences, win olympiads, draw and play musical instruments. The child is busy and attached to business, he is successful and sweet, but he has no time to breathe, get bored, look around and want to achieve something or master something himself. It would seem that a person has all the data for a triumphant entry into adulthood, he can do everything, but he does not know what to want, his eyes do not burn, he moves along the thumb and does not find incentives for active actions and development inside himself.

Of course, any teenager or adult has every chance to listen to himself, find his point of application of strength, turn on proactivity and happily move forward. But let's give the word to the statistics: children who are overprotected and directed, as well as children who are neglected too much, are more prone to deviant behavior, depression and mental disorders in adulthood. At the same time, children who were given an average amount of attention in adulthood are much more likely to remain within the normal range.

I want and I need - between two fires

It turns out that such a simple question: “How to help a child study well?” - in fact, it is connected with life-giving themes about happiness and will, the search for one's own business, freedom and borders. And just the theme of freedom and boundaries provides several more important and specific keys to success.

Both in childhood and in adult life there are two banks: I want and I must. If you land on one of these shores and wave a pen to another, then you can safely say goodbye to peace and hopes for happiness. The only way out is to connect them with a bridge. On the one hand, the child needs to instill responsibility and discipline so that he learns important skills for life, learns to interact with people, and finally receives a certificate and a profession. And he was alive and well. On the other hand, the child should not be put too much pressure so that he does not close down, does not become discouraged from an excess of responsibilities, but can breathe quite freely and choose those things that make him happy and meaningful.

The measure of disciplinary actions is selected individually, taking into account the capabilities and habits of each family: one child needs to be praised and pushed, the other one needs to be listened to and lured, - honest parental intuition and love in half with respect doing their job. But there are also quite working methods that help to strengthen independence, responsibility and pleasure from learning, even when it comes to unloved algebra. Of course, in the end, the child will not begin to kiss the textbook, but his knowledge and self-confidence can grow noticeably.

How to help your child want to learn

Gradually transfer responsibility for lessons, grades and orientation in school affairs to the child. If the homework for the first-grader is written down by the mother, and the whole family helps to do the homework, then by the middle school it is necessary to convey to the child the idea that studying is his job. He will be encouraged for success and will be helped if everything is bad, but you need to rely on yourself. And convey this responsibility honestly: after all, sometimes mothers themselves do not notice how corrosively they control the child, as if his studies are mother's business and mother's honor. Do not panic because of his failures, do not rush to save the baby with your strong hands - then the child will feel the responsibility seriously. And he will feel pride and confidence when he learns to cope with problems himself.

Don't forget the gingerbread. Often parents brandish the whip and retaliate when the child delivers deuces and remarks, but react too sluggishly to good results. And good results are not only fives and victories in olympiads, it is also the ability to get together on time, remember sections and electives, different interests that the child brings from school. Previously, my daughter did her homework until ten in the evening, but now she finishes everything by eight? - a definite success! Praise your child, do something nice for him, just to celebrate some school achievement. This is not a bribe - it's just important that the child associates school duties with joyful and positive things.

Teach your child to find pluses and bonuses in different school affairs. Need to write a music essay? - help to choose a theme from which the child will shine. Bored with geometry? - but you can draw beautiful figures and points like this. Do not remember dates in history? But the teacher tells interesting things. The more interesting and invigorating nuances the student finds for himself, the easier and more willingly he will study.

Teach your child to reward themselves for completed tasks and any achievements. I did my homework, I said to myself: "I'm done!" - and went to play Lego, Minecraft (or glue tanks). The reward is also the recognition of classmates, the respect of the teacher, a good reputation, a pleasant sense of accomplishment - teach your son or daughter to see bonuses in all these things. The brain is conveniently arranged: if a person received a reward for some actions before, then more energy and hormones of pleasure are released for these actions already at the very beginning of the work and even before it starts!

A great way to deal with monotonous work is to break it down into parts. Then, at the end of each stage, when the student “exhales” and internally strokes his head, the brain receives positive feedback and reinforces success with a small portion of pleasure hormones. From stage to stage, the pleasure will grow until the student finishes everything.

A great working way to increase learning motivation is to associate learning with pleasure, build a series of associations with positive things. Further, the brain itself will establish an internal routine, logistics, a system of rewards and incentives. And then study is no longer hard work with a lean face, but a working space of opportunities and joyful discoveries!

Many adults say: “Oh, if my parents supported me in time ...” They did not manage to achieve what they wanted, they did not receive support, and their own desire was not enough. If parents were a little more attentive to them and said in time: “Be bold! You're doing great and everything will be fine!" ─ The result would have been very different. This is the motivation ─ in success, for good studies, for any other achievements. And how to motivate a little person, we will consider in this article.

Basic rules of motivation

How to motivate a child? It is enough to follow simple rules. For their implementation, adults will have to reorganize somewhat, which will require some effort.

Possible adult mistakes

If a child is confident that he can achieve success, he will do everything possible to achieve the goal. And when there is no confidence in the successful completion of the task, but everything turns out, then the degree of happiness is huge. But if the requirements are too high and with all the efforts there is no result, the child does not receive approval, there is no motivation. A small person will not have the desire to learn and develop even if others consider his good results to be something quite ordinary, as if he can never be wrong.

Success in school is the result of formed motivation. Doing homework is a test of the strength of parents in many families. Children cannot bring themselves to start doing their homework. They will do anything - play, draw, watch TV. The parent loses his temper and comes to screaming and swearing. The student feels constant pressure and, in the end, does not want to study. The result can be total academic failure and mental apathy.

Basic Mistakes

1. Starting school too early. Parents proudly note that their child has a lot of knowledge for his age and conclude that he is completely ready for school. But psychological readiness is more important. The skill should be formed to do what is required of him at the moment, and not what he wants.
2. The age of the child's skeleton at the start of training. The hand must complete its formation. The number of teeth ─ by entering school, the child has 4 front incisors ─ 2 upper and 2 lower should already be replaced. If biologically the baby has not yet matured, it will be difficult for him to study at school. Too fast fatigue and the inability to fulfill the requirements of the teacher will make him dislike the school and everything connected with it.
3. The child was protected, and he did not attend kindergarten. He did not have the opportunity to learn to respect other people's opinions, observe restrictions and learn the norms necessary for life in a team.
4. Family problems. A child who is formed in a constantly heated atmosphere and is used to it will not properly respond to school troubles. His strength is simply not enough.
5. If in everyday reality the child is loose, elementary concepts about the daily routine are not respected, it is much more difficult for him to study. If in his free time he has a certain number of additional classes and activities, he is more focused on successful studies.
6. Adults surrounding the child should be able to agree among themselves on a single level of requirements for him.
7. Both harsh measures of influence are unacceptable ─ intimidation, beatings, psychological suppression, as well as the opposite - too strong guardianship, giving gifts.
8. The abilities and possibilities of the child must be fairly assessed so that there are no excessive demands. You should not suspect the baby of laziness, there may be serious reasons for manifestations of apathy and laziness (illness, a special psychological state).
9. Incorrect attitude towards the child and the results of his efforts. It can be an offensive nickname, a comparison with another child, a mockery, etc.
10. A huge number of parents hope that their child will have those interests that were important to them in childhood. Especially if they themselves failed to achieve success, and they project their expectations onto the child.

Formation of motivation

How practically to form in the child the desire to act, how to motivate the child? The basis is the creation of an environment around the child in which he himself would like to learn something.

Basic moments

• It is necessary to clarify why there is no motivation ─ maybe the child wants to study, but it doesn’t work out, or these are shortcomings in education.
• The kid does not know how to think in the long term. Therefore, he can only talk about the near future. The words that if you study poorly, then you will not achieve anything in life ─ for him an empty phrase.
• After finding out the cause, try to eliminate it. And the mistakes of the educational moment must be corrected.
• If you can’t learn from a child, then you need to overcome it together, help and form the necessary skills.
• Gradually, the child will develop the necessary ability to listen and the ability to obey. But while this is not the case, it is very important that parents observe and participate in the learning process, help determine the necessary frequency and sequence of actions, ─ when to sit down for lessons, when to rest, and so on. You need to instill self-discipline in your child.
• The zone of proximal development ─ it must be created and maintained. It is unacceptable to perform a task for a child if he can do it himself.
• The most important topic is how to evaluate the completed task. After all, he tried very hard and, compared with the previous task, achieved noticeable success. His parents praised him. But the teacher at the school assessed the result by comparing it with the results of the rest of the students, and the assessment is bad. In order not to find yourself in such a situation, you need to be aware of the required level of knowledge and skills.

• If in the family, with increasing demands on the child, he was helped, encouraged and treated with warmth, then the motivation for success will form and he will study with pleasure. If they treat him harshly, arbitrarily or simply indifferently, a completely different motive will form - how to avoid a situation in which failure awaits.
• The way a child evaluates himself is the most important moment in the formation of motivation for learning. If the kid evaluates his abilities lower than they actually are, then there will be no motivation to study. If a too high self-assessment has been formed, then there is a danger of not noticing one's shortcomings in studies and not recognizing them. School performance is not fundamental to success in life. First of all, it is necessary to develop in the child an adequate perception of himself in a positive way. It is important to encourage the child for his success. Encouragement in the material sense is a controversial issue and everyone has the right to decide on this for himself. A great incentive option ─ joint visits to interesting places, trips and travels.
• There can be no immediate success. It is important to follow a confident sequence in actions, even if you do not see visible progress.
• Self-control is a necessary skill. The vast majority of mistakes appear due to inattention and the child must be able to check himself, learn to correct them. Gradually, many business qualities are developed, which in the transitional age will help to form the motivation to achieve high results. The process is long, it is important to be patient and not to pull the child in vain.
• The child must necessarily believe that he will certainly succeed. Both parents and teachers should support him.
• A difficult moment at school ─ the transition to middle classes increases the load, unfamiliar teachers, new subjects. You need to constantly have contact with the child, listen and hear him, come to the rescue when problems arise, teach him to redistribute his time and workload.
• Passing the state certification is a horror story for all high school students and their parents. The vast majority of schoolchildren by the age of 16 have an idea of ​​what they want to do. The task of parents is to support in the choice and help to decide. It is necessary to respect the decision of the teenager, even if the parents do not like this choice.

The surest way to motivate a child, including to study, is to form in him a clear awareness of what he is doing, what is the meaning of all efforts. We, adults, think that everything lies on the surface and the value of study is indisputable. But for a child, this is not the case. And our task is to give him the opportunity to decide on his own future and, motivating him to succeed, help him achieve what he wants.

With a problem how to motivate a child, that is, to contribute to his internal development, the desire to act and achieve heights in studies, sports, creativity, many parents face.

The fact is that motivation - inner strength for positive changes in life - is not always enough for adults, and children often lose interest in important and useful things they are busy with. Let's think together how we can make a difference.

Why does motivation disappear?

Surely everyone at least once observed how children behave differently at school and in kindergarten. Some energetically take on something new, strive to help educators, lend a hand in the classroom, willingly support various competitions and extracurricular activities. Others are passive, as if by force, responding to the attempts of children and adults to stir them up, you can often hear from them: “Why me?”, “Well, I don’t feel like something ...”

Why does this happen: at about three years old, all children show a thirst for knowledge of the world around them, boldly try everything new, and then one of them retains this interest and desire to comprehend different areas of knowledge, and someone “goes with the flow”, does not troubling yourself with mental and physical stress?

Teachers and psychologists unanimously convince: motivate the child adults must! It is they who initially control his behavior, cognitive process and achievements (later this will happen largely due to self-motivation). If the correct upbringing tactics were chosen, then the child will receive powerful support from the parents, experience inspiration, receive the first positive results, and experience the taste of victory.

If adults do not attach importance to this, do not show interest in the success of their son or daughter, are indifferent to their achievements, then motivation disappears, because kids do a lot for the sake of approval, praise. If there is no moral satisfaction, then why try?

How to motivate a winner?

R. Gandapas has an excellent training about people who "made themselves." This is good material for reflection, especially for parents, because the author leads to an understanding of the importance of motivate the child in childhood, so that from an early age he showed leadership qualities: responsibility and desire to get the best result.

Of course, the example of adults who are authority for the child is important. And also trust, praise, challenge. But how to implement a successful motivation strategy?

• Encourage your child to ask questions. A logical chain should be built in his mind: curiosity is a good quality, adults understand and appreciate it, because interest in life is a sign of an intelligent person. Don't laugh or get angry. If you behave incorrectly towards the asking baby, he will soon draw other conclusions and will no longer contact you.

• Support the research fervor of your child, just direct it in the right direction. Sets of a young chemist, physicist, biologist - a wonderful gift for little naturalists

• Find out what the kid is passionate about now, ask his opinion, ask questions, show that it is very important for you that he gain knowledge and experience on topics of interest

• Unfortunately, the school often contributes to the demotivation of children: along with good, conscientious teachers, there are real “monsters” in it that discourage the child from learning. Be interested in how things are in the class, what interesting things you learned in the classroom. If you see that a child is being bullied, transfer him to another school: do not waste time on proceedings, you can deal with this later, but first, support normal

• Encourage communication of a teenager with enthusiastic guys, because in many ways a successful person is “made” by his environment, but do not impose your own judgments, do not compare him with friends

• Do not use threats, punishment, humiliation as a motivator: this vicious path leads to a deformation of the personality of a small person

• Remember that grade is not an indicator of abilities and intelligence, you should not attach decisive importance to it.

It is necessary to motivate a child to achieve not occasionally, but constantly. This process is impossible without good personal contact and trust, so adults should take care of their preservation in the first place.

Hello dear readers! Just yesterday, you yourself asked for 5 more minutes, sometimes skipped school, and today wake up your child to study. You, like no one else, now understand that it’s not enough just to go to classes. I would like to like it too. This is the secret to a happy life.

Today we will analyze how to motivate a child to study, the advice of a psychologist and loving parents who have managed to achieve some success in this field.

Speak, Respond, Support

If a child asks a question, is interested in something, do not send him to ask Google. Even if you don't know the answer yourself, show concern for his problem. Ask to bring a dictionary, an encyclopedia, to find the answer to the question with him.

Show that you are encouraging his interest. The process of learning can be interesting and you can and should learn something together. The next time when a teenager does not have enough attention, he will not be satisfied, but will work on some topic that unites you and tells his results.

Even at 14-15 years old, you can interest the child in new facts. Spend some time on the Internet, look at what the human body is capable of, find funny historical facts about the life of Napoleon or Alexander the Great, throw him a book that you yourself recently read. Very soon you will understand what the child is most interested in and support this desire in him.

Let you have a common topic for conversation. Children always enjoy spending time with their parents. You are much more developed, you have experience. Give the teenager new facts that he had not thought about before.

For example, if you saw that he was reading " Crime and Punishment Dostoevsky or this book just lies on his desk, share your impressions, ask how he himself feels about it. You can even sit down and read it yourself by opening it on your phone while it is engrossed in the paper version.

Watch a historical film with him. Prepare in advance, look on the Internet for any inaccuracies in it. For example, in one of the frames of the film "Braveheart", a plastic bottle and a car are visible. Involve your teenager in this game. This not only motivates him to study, but also develops a good one.

Environment

At 12 years old, children are very dependent on society. They like to communicate. Contribute to the fact that the child will be surrounded by people who are interested in the same things as he is. Write it in . If friends study well and achieve success, then he will try to match them.

Remember that not all children are born for sports. Before forcing a child to go to the section, see what he is really interested in. Perhaps music or drawing is closer to him. Even if he likes to grow plants or take care of animals, try to find the appropriate section.

Not all of us become Olympic champions. Your goal now should not be to realize your own unfulfilled dreams, but to develop discipline, socialization and creating a favorable environment around the child.

If he does not want to go anywhere, offer him to fulfill his dream in exchange for 5 classes. After he fulfills his part of the obligations, realize his desire. Then ask if he wants to get something else for 5-10 trips or if he really doesn't like this section, and you should pick up something else.

A child, starting from the age of 10, is able to make decisions. If you treat them with understanding, then your relationship will develop many times better. will be comfortable and children .

In no case do not push when it comes to hobbies. There are so many interesting things in the world, I am sure that among this variety there is something that your child will really like. Even if he loves computer games - treat it right, do not shout and insist, do not prove that he is wasting his time. Thousands of adults do the same, and this little man is only 12.

Offer a programming or 3D modeling circle. Perhaps it is in this area that he wants to develop and subsequently succeed.

School

Sometimes children do not want to go to school because of the unfavorable environment. If the class is weak, then it will not have the desire to stand out. Try to learn about school life as much as possible. Who is with whom the child is friends. If you do not ask direct questions, you will only win and get really truthful answers.

In general, try to communicate with him more often as an adult. Imagine if you were asked: “Are you offended at work?”. Agree, you would not answer either, even if it were true. This humiliates a person, makes him weak. Perhaps you managed to raise a brave, strong little man who wants to cope with troubles himself.

But the question is: “Who do you study with? Who do you like there and why? - will give more chances to get a real assessment of the situation.

Do not rush to deal with teachers and students, you can only make things worse. Help him and ask if he can manage on his own. Depending on the circumstances, make the decision to intervene or not, it should not harm your child.

If you do things too often, you provoke him to hide the truth from you. Like any person, he does not want to lose control of the situation. Try to discuss more, find out what exactly he wants, and only as a last resort, when there is no other way out, act.

I can recommend Peg Dawson's book Your child can do everything". It helps to develop and develop organizational skills. It will help identify strengths and weaknesses, balance weaknesses, suggest ways to develop the necessary skills, such as discipline, and even teach you how to communicate with him during difficult life situations.

Well, the last piece of advice that I can give you is never demean the authority of the teacher in the eyes of the child. This certainly does not contribute to the fact that he wants to accept information from his mouth. If the mother does not approve of him, then why should the baby?

Well that's all. See you soon and don't forget to subscribe to the newsletter.